My Kind of Woman

20. Losing Control

Christmas came and passed. And though I wished desperately it was otherwise, I didn't see Mio again until two days before the new year. The snow was set to already start clearing by January, and in a few months, I would be out of school for good. I managed to get through Christmas with my dad, and without any input from my mother. I assumed she was still arrested, or roaming somewhere in Florida - miles and miles away. At least, it was warmer there than where I was.

The night I got home after Mio's doorstep kiss, I tore open the second parcel to see what had been so secretive. Inside was a book with a crease in the cover and brownish, tea-stained pages. It was a personal copy, with its torn first page and cover art that appeared like it was drawn in the eighties. It smelt floral, of Mio, like she'd sprayed her perfume over it. I turned to the inside page, and on the card back was a little message.

A book that makes me smile, I hope you smile when you read this too, Norah. Merry Christmas.

-Mio

I left that page dogeared, and before I slept for the next few nights, I opened and read it with her voice in my mind.

But on a day when the snow was turning to slush in the gutters, I was called out of bed again by Jackie. That day, she was tossing things at the bedroom window as my dad had gone out for work and locked the door. I pulled myself out of bed and to the window, where I pushed it open with my elbow.

"Watch it! You'll break the window!" I called down to her.

She was standing down on the path in a lighter jacket and her thick snow boots. My driveway path was mostly clearer; it had started to melt down to that muddy residue that coated tires. Her scarf was flapping back by her ears and I could feel the lick of the wind up in my bedroom window.

"It was snow, you drama queen," she said, and I could tell she was rolling her eyes, "come down and open the door."

"Hang on, hang on, I just got up. I'm getting dressed," I yelled down.

After shutting the window, I sluggishly ambled around my room, getting changed and brushing my teeth simultaneously. Seeing as Jackie had been in a lighter coat, I didn't wrap up as heavily as I had been over Christmas. Out on the path, Jackie was shuddering dramatically and chattering her teeth as loudly as possible.

"You're not trying to make me feel bad, are you?" I asked as I came out to her side.

"Well, if you do feel bad, you've only got yourself to blame. You could've opened the door for me," she said. 

"Just mopped up, didn't want snow in the house." I shrugged, smiling slightly.

"I would've kicked my feet!"

"I didn't know that."

"You think you unlocking the door was just a part of my plan to get snow in your house?"

I grinned, "it's called thinking smart."

"It's called being a dumbass." She flicked the top of my ear and I winced, complaining that it was cold.

We walked out onto the road then stopped at the street corner. Well, Jackie stopped still, and I a second after. She bent down and started double-knotting the laces to her snow boots.  She kept glancing up past me though.

"Why are we still standing here?" I asked, following her line of sight.

"Shoe laces," Jackie mumbled.

I pointed to her feet. "You're done."

"Oh, yeah. I'm thinking."

"About what, big brain?" I watched her glance around the corner, towards where we'd walk to school in the mornings. "Where are we going actually?" I added.