Chaos | A Ninjago High School AU

Chapter 14

I'm drawn to Jay. There's something about him that's magnetic and pulls me in. Maybe it's his smile, or his laugh, or the way his nose crinkles when he laughs. Maybe it's how when he's freaking out, he tries to push through it and get to the other side. Maybe it's how kind he is to me. Maybe it's the way he hugs me and how when I'm in his arms I feel safe.

I realized I had feelings for Jay a while ago. I had forgotten what having a friend felt like, so I thought that what I feel for him is typical for someone towards their best friend. I realized, though, that best friends don't go on picnics and lie in each other's arms, looking up at the stars.

I've been consciously realizing all of the things I've already felt. I've noticed the smile that automatically crosses my face when I see him. I noticed the spark I feel every time he touches me. I've noticed how truly adorable he is when he talks about something he's passionate about. I've felt it for a while now. I just didn't realize it.

When he wanted to ask me a question on Monday, I got tight in my chest. I wanted him to ask me out. Hell, I still do. He didn't though. I shouldn't had expected it. I don't want to lose him.

Even after all that Jay has done for me, Kai still wants to compare him to the guy who scarred me forever. Comparing the two is a plain insult to Jay.

"I mean, he's just here to fit the Cole sized whole in your heart, isn't he?" Kai scoffs.

"Jay's here because I enjoy Jay's company, and I appreciate him. That's more than I could ever say about you," I spit.

Kai looks up, seeming hurt. He always does this. He plays the victim every time, as if I'm the one that's hurting him, as if I'm the one who is always the jerk first. I've tried many, many times to be nice to him. Every negative thing I say towards him has been provoked by him.

"I'm just here to break you out of your day dream. If you really want company, the real Cole will take you back," he says, quieter now, but the words are still piercing.

When I'm about to snap at him again, Jay takes a hold of my hand, sending sparks through me. "He's not worth it," he whispers to me.

His hold alone calms me down a bit, and I look back at Kai. "I'm going to my room. Now, you have to do the dishes all by yourself." I smirk, pulling Jay along with me to my room. Even though I'm still infuriated, Jay helps me not lash out.

When we reach my room, I close the door and let out a large sigh. "I hate him."

"Has he always been bad?" Jay flops down on my bed before rolling over to face my direction. "Your bed is so comfy."

"Nope, only since the spring of freshman year," I gaze over at the picture that I still haven't taken off my wall. It's of my family, my picture perfect family, before everything got messed up. It was before my parents left us to work in the city, before I dated Cole, before my brother turned from protective to the biggest jerk I've ever met.

"Have you ever asked him why he does it?" Jay wonders out loud. When I look over at him, he's looking at the picture on the wall.

"He wants me to be with Cole again."

"But why? From what I've collected, no one should have never forgiven him," he asks. At the words "from what I've collected" I cringe a bit. I've been meaning to tell Jay what happened, but I could never get myself to. I don't want him to view me as weak and helpless.

However, it's not fair to him to not know. People I've never talked to know. Everyone in my classes know. The person who means the most to me shouldn't be the only person to not know.

"Scoot over. I'm going to tell you. Our project can wait," I decide.

He sits up. After he moves over, he leans against the headboard. "Tell me what?"