Forbidden Lust - Adam Driver

IX. Growing desire

This day was longer than yesterday. You couldn't stop thinking about Adam and it was dragging you insane. You spent the rest of your morning on set, looking Daisy and Mark Hamill's performance. Lucky for you, Adam was shooting somewhere else but you had to go there after lunch.

It was already noon and you met Aiden for lunch. He was so happy because everyone was so nice at him, and he already bonded with the great Carrie Fisher. You were happy for him.

"Why are you so quiet? It's everything ok?" He looked at you, taking a sip of his can of Coke.

"Yeah I'm just tired," you said, lying to him again. Your mind wouldn't stop bringing Adam back, you could feel him near you, you could smell his scent, feel his skin. You were afraid you were getting obsessed with the man. It made you sad actually, having such a desire for a forbidden man.

The day went by slowly. You spent all your afternoon on set with Adam and Dumhnall. You were amazed at how professional they were, their roles impressed you the most. They were perfect for it. Soon the end of the day came. Everyone was tired and ready to go back to the hotel.

You went back to your motorhome to grab your stuff and meet Aiden at the port. Lucky for you, actors were on a different ferry than yours so you wouldn't see Adam until the next day.

Aiden and you were silent on the way back, as both of you were really tired. You agree to meet at Aiden's room later for dinner, you were going to use the room service. You remembered what happened the first night you tried to do that...

Going back to your room, you took off your clothes as you walk into your bathroom. You took a long warm shower and try to relax. You find yourself thinking of him, once again. You started imagining what would it feel like to kiss him, to run your hands through his hair, to feel his tongue, to taste his body. The heat began to grow in your body and you felt your nipples get hard.

You wonder how he must be in bed. You swear he was rough, and you wonder if he had any secret kink. Damn, his wife was really lucky.

You snapped out of your fantasy, feeling embarrassed of yourself. You got off the shower and walked to your room. You took your phone and decided to call your parents. Still naked with a towel around your body, you caught up with them. You told them about how great the people were, how beautiful the island was and how amazing the set was.

After you hung up, you decided to put on some grey sweatpants and a black T-shirt, with some white sneakers. You sat there for a minute, checking your social media and decided to go to Aiden's room.

You knocked on his door and listen to him telling you to come in. You did, closing the door behind you. You found Aiden under the covers of his bed.

"Join me," he said, pulling his covers for you to lie with him. You sat on the bed and took off your sneakers and lied on the bed with him.

"How was your day?" You said looking at him.

"It was pretty nice," he said smiling. "What do you wanna eat? I was thinking about junk food, maybe a hamburger and some fries" he said, yawning.

"Yes, please," you said "I'm such in the mood for that"

"Great," he said, grabbing the phone on the nightstand and ordering the food.

You two stayed there, talking about each other's day while you waited for your food. Aiden and you bonded, it felt like you've known each other for years when it was nearly going to be one week since you met. You felt him like a brother and already loved him. He had such an amazing personality, it was magnetic. The food arrived and you two started eating, sitting on the bed.

"Have you ever been with a married man?" You asked Aiden, as you put some fries on your mouth.

"Well, I have actually," he said "you already know I have a thing with older ones..." he said raising an eyebrow.

"And how was it?" You kept asking.

"Best sex I've ever had in my life," he said "there's something about adultery you know, it gives the relationship such a spice. I've never felt more alive in my life, knowing it was so wrong, that it was so nasty and forbidden"

You nodded hearing paying attention to his words.

"Married men usually cheat because of the lack of good sex in their marriages" he continued "so it's lucky for us, the mistresses, becau-" he shut up and glanced at you "why do you ask?"

"I'm just curiou-" you started talking, but he interrupted you.

"Oh my god, you're thinking about fucking Adam" he exclaimed.

"Please don't be ordinary," you said laughing, trying to hide the fact that it was true " I would never put myself between a marriage"

"You're so transparent, I love you," he said laughing. "What's going on with you two?"

"Well, you know" you started talking, deciding you were going to be sincere with him. You looked down at your feet "it's just that I want him so much Aiden. I can't stop thinking about him, every time I close my eyes I imagine him, his body, his face" you shut up looking embarrassed at Aiden "and I'm so ashamed about it" you said covering your face with your hands.

"Honey, it's alright," Aiden said holding your hands "we've all been there"

"And I think he wants me too," you said blushing. You told Aiden about your episode at your room last night, and the one on the motorhome earlier that day. Aiden listens carefully and thought for a minute before talking.

"There is definitely going to be sex here," he said, making you laugh.

"Don't be silly Aiden, this is just platonic" you said.

"Believe me, I know platonic. This ain't it" he said, looking at you.

"What should I do?" You asked.

"Here is my advice, do as you want. I know what I'm about to say is polemic but I'm saying it anyway" he said looking at you. "Monogamy doesn't exist. People can't be their entire life wanting always the same person. They can only love one, but desire its stronger. Cheating happens, it's inevitable"

"And it's not like you know his wife either, it's not like she is your friend" he continued.

"So your basically telling me that I should make a move?" You asked, confused.

"No honey," he said "but if the situation comes, and you are sure it is what you want, you should go for it. Their marriage's not your problem"

You nodded, quietly.

"I know it's a lot to think about, and I know that you may not agree with me" he continued talking "but this is just my opinion, I'm not saying you should ruin his marriage. I'm just saying that you have to be bold and put your desire first. Your life is yours to live"

"Plus, a little danger and excitement never killed anybody" he smiled at you.

You thanked him for being so honest and true with his words. You two finished eating and you went back to your room, hugging and thanking Aiden again.

Lying on your bed you thought about Aiden's words. He wasn't wrong, though you never thought that you could be the third wheel in any relationship. You've never had a boyfriend, everyone just left you before getting involved. You got used to it and started having one night stands because you couldn't face abandonment. You didn't want to get attached to anyone, because everyone ended up hurting and leaving you. You thought about how you never took any chances or bold choices, you always run from your feelings and detached from everyone.

But this time was different. You knew what you wanted, you knew what you wanted to do. But you didn't know if you were prepared to follow your instincts...