2- Take A Joke, Dude

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The "adventurers" turned out to be who they said they were, and their names being Aphmau, Laurance, Katelyn and Garroth (he got out of the Irene dimension and Zane went back to the nether)

They were looking around New Meteli while Cadenza was filling me in about them and what they're like. It's so weird to think that Cadenza has such amazing friends - from the stories shes told me about them at least - because she usually has the worst taste in people: me, for example.

"So yeah, I really think you'd like Laurance, he's a flirt like you."

"Didn't seem too flirty to me," I replied. She told me he's a casanova but I didn't buy it, "there wasn't even a single kind or nice vibe coming from him, nevermind a flirty one."

"Well I guess he could've changed... but then again maybe it was because you were questioning about his knowledge on his own sister." she laughed.

I gasp dramatically, "Please, I literally just looked at him!"

"Yeah, yeah, just apologise when you see them,"

"but-"

"Shut up, go get them and apologise!"

I sighed and bowed jokingly, "yes your majesty."

"Oh, and n/n?"

"yeah?"

"If you and Laurance do... Well, you know, just don't tell me. I don't want to picture it."

"Cadenza!? What the fuck is wrong with you? You're obviously thinking about it to bring it up." I gagged, "You better not be thinking of any insest shit in there!" I tapped her head.

"Ew! Gross! Of course not!"

We both continued to gag until I walked out of the door.

~

After wondering around aimlessly for a few minutes I found them, "Hey guys," I sighed. Stupid Cadenza and her stupid orders. "Sorry for being so rude at our first encounter, it was very unprofessional and I should have realised who you were and believed you when you said so."

"Apology accepted," Aphmau replied, smiling sweetly. "you were just doing your job."

"Barely." a man whispered under his breath.

"Laurance!" Aphmau Scalded,

"What? All I'm saying is that if she would do her job properly without being so sexual she'd have nothing to apologise for, I mean look at what she's wearing!"
(outfit at the top, you can change it around if you want idrc it's not important)

"First of all, your sister made this outfit, and second of all, I was being sensual not sexual. There's a difference."

"Not really" he mumbled.

Katelyn obviously got bored because she groaned loudly in annoyance, rolled her eyes, grabbed Laurance by the wrist and dragged him away while Aphmau and Garroth followed.

I guess I'll just stand here, then.

~

About half an hour passed and I was still wandering around. Well, I'm actually on patrol, but it's the same thing. All of a sudden I heard a girl scream, so of course I went to check it out like a good person and normal guard.

I sprinted into the woods and saw a little girl tied up to the tree with her parents. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but the men that tied them up obviously weren't happy. I recon they're bandits. Without thinking much about what lead up to the situation, I was trying to form a strategy to defeat them. That's when I heard the little girl scream again. I look towards her and my eyes widened. She's covered in blood now.

I analysed to what happened and they stabbed her fucking parents. 4 grown men decided it'll be okay to kill a little girls parents right next to her face. The fucking audacity. Just imagine the PTSD. I totally lost it and just went for them, I'm not really sure what happened as a honk of adrenaline and rage overcome me, that poor girl. I managed to take them down and I started untying the rope.

"It's okay, you're safe now." I tell the girl. I'm not sure how much it helped to put what she's feeling at ease, but I'm not usually one to comfort people.

Suddenly, one of the men seemed to of got up and pinned me to the ground. I thought I killed him, that trickster.

"What are you gonna do?" I asked, "kill me and have some necrophilia orgy with them?" I gestured to the girls parents

"Perhaps." the man said in a deep voice.

Gross, that was a joke.

All of a sudden the man laid all of his weight on me, what the fuck is he doing? Is he trying to crush me? Then I realised there's a sword in his back and he wasnt moving.

Oh, he's dead lol.

The current circumstances reminded of an old memory, and I started to freak out and hyperventilate. Luckily, before it became too noticeable, I seemed to calm myself down. This isn't the time to think about that. God would it be embarrassing.

I shimmied out from underneath and got up. I was covered in blood.

"Cadenza's gonna kill me" I complained, she just made this outfit this morning.

"I'm pretty sure she'd rather see your clothes ripped apart rather than you." a guy said - Laurance.

"Gah! What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Saving your life obviously, I heard you scream." he smirked. He's mocking me. Asshole.

"I- what? That wasn't me, it was her," I pointed to the girl frantically. He obviously didn't believe me, but he was probably just teasing me. I pout and cross my arms, "I had it all under control."

"You were talking about him having sex with your dead corpse!" He spat in disbelief.

Oh, haha. I guess I was.

I glare at him, annoyed, "Oh take a joke, dude."

-It Do Be Like that Sometimes-     |Laurance x reader|Where stories live. Discover now