Whatever Happens |Kyman • Stenny • Creek|

Chapter 62: A Thousand Sorries

"I had a dream once; All by myself with no one else; I thought I'd died and gone to Heaven; Then I woke up."

~Kyle's POV~

Saturday (Week 6)

The sound of my phone vibrating woke me up at around two in the morning. I looked at my phone screen and noticed it was Cartman. What the fuck could he possibly want?

As I went to answer it, I noticed that the moonlight was illuminating my left arm where my new cuts were. There was dried blood around them, which made them look more gross and fucked up than they really were.

"What." I said tiredly.

"Well, someone must've woken up on the wrong side of the bed today." Cartman joked, making me roll my eyes.

"I was sleeping. What do you want, Cartman?" I asked meanly. I rested my head on my pillow as I waited for Cartman to answer me.

"Get dressed and meet me outside. We're going for a car ride." He demanded. I scoffed and bursted out laughing. "Okay, first off, you're still drunk. And second, I'm pissed off at you."

"You make me want to eat a bullet, bullet."

Cartman sighed as I rested my eyes. I couldn't believe how exhausted I felt all of a sudden. He wants to go for a car ride and I just want to sleep. He really is something else.

"I know. That's why I want to talk. Just get dressed and I'll be there in five minutes." He said, and then hung up. I let out a frustrated sigh and jumped out of bed. My closet door was slightly open still, revealing my orange jacket that I had stored away after my shopping spree with Butters. I still wasn't feeling ready to go back to my old self yet. Butters and the goth kids got me pretty into this new style. I'm mainly in it for the music, the cigarettes, and the message it gives out to other people. Ever since I began dressing in darker clothes, I've noticed that people left me alone more. It could be because they don't recognize me since my whole appearance is different, but it's probably because people at that school don't like emo or goth kids.

I've wanted people to leave me alone for the longest time when I started high school. Butters must've wanted the same thing because that's when he began dressing the way he does now. There are obviously more reasons behind Butters' dramatic change in appearance, but wanting bullies to leave him alone was one of them.

I know for a fact that other schools aren't like this. Whether or not the kids are emo, they'll still get picked on. The people in my school just think they're too good to even stand next to someone who is goth or emo. I should've noticed this earlier and did what Butters did. Every once in a while, someone would spew a homophobic insult in my face, but I like to tell everyone that the homophobic bullying ended in high school. It never completely ends, I guess. There will always be that asshole out there who picks on me for it.

I took the orange jacket, molded it up into a ball, and threw it in the garbage next to my desk angrily. I don't ever plan on going back to pretending that everything was okay. Nothing will ever be okay.

I went through my closet that had all of my new clothes in it. Butters and I ended up going back to Spencer's the other day to get more clothes. I used what was left of my last paycheck from work to buy this whole wardrobe. A lot of the clothes were on clearance, which is why I was able to pick out a ton of them.

What I picked out was a pair of black skinny jeans, a black long-sleeved t-shirt with the words, "Fuck Off", written across the chest, and my black zip-up jacket. My hair was still wavy with my bangs covering the tops of my eyes. I still have to thank Sam for introducing me to the hair relaxer and deep conditioning treatment. I might even take this a step further and dye my hair black. I won't be able to use the hair relaxer treatment since it can make dyed hair fall out (Author's note: I had a bad experience with that 😂), but we'll see I guess. I think Butters wanted to take me out next week to get some ear piercings and maybe a tattoo, which I'm kind of skeptical about. He wants to get gauges and a few tattoos on his face, but I might just get a few cartilage piercings and a tattoo on my chest or arm.