In Love With The King (Shrek Fanfic)

Back To Far Far Away Pt. 2

While Artie and I kept walking, Shrek, Puss and Donkey finally caught up. I looked back at him and then looked ahead again. "Listen Artie, if you think this whole mad scene ain't dope, I feel you dude.I mean, I'm not trying to get up in your grill or raise your roof, or whatever, but what I am screaming is yo! Check out this kazing thazing bazaby." All of us couldn't believe what we were hearing. I covered my mouth, trying to hide my laughter. "I mean, if it doesn’t groove or what I’m saying ain’t straight trippin’, just say, "Oh no you didn’t! You know, you’re gettin’ on my last nerve." And then I’ll know it’s... then I’ll know it’s whack!" He then got whacked in the face with a tree branch and then Artie dashed away, while holding my hand. "Somebody help! I've been kidnapped by a monster, trying to relate to me!!" He yelled, making me laugh. "Artie! Wait!" Shrek called out and Artie began to bang on the door. "C'mon! C'mon! Help! Help! Hello!" A beam of light flashed and then a face appeared, startling Doneky. 

"Greetings cosmic children of the universe! Welcome to my serenity circle! Please leave any bad vibes outside the healing vortex. Now prepare ..." The message fizzled out and then the door to the cottage creeked open. When I saw the old man, I realized it was Mr. Merlin. "I knew, I should've gotten that warrenty!" He said, as he hit on the sercurity device and then it shocked him. "Mr. Merlin?" Artie looked at him and Shrek asked; "You know this guy?" "Yeah, he was the school's magic teacher.. until he had his nervous break down." Artie told him and I nodded. "Yep.." "Uh, technically I was merely a victim of a level three fatigue." Mr. Merlin corrected us. "And at the request of my therapist and the school authorities, I have retired to the tranquility of nature to discover my divine purpose." He said and then he smacked a fly, that landed on his head, receiving a weird look from all of us. "Now, can I interest anyone in a snack or beverage?" "Uh.. no." Shrek said and then Mr. Merlin held up a baking dish with rocks in it. "Sure you don't wanna try my famous rock au-gratin?" He asked, as he took a bite out of the rocks and then his gums started bleeding. "It's organic!" He said, with a smile (Jeez.. he's so weird -_- .-.). 

"Oh thanks, I just ate a boulder on the way in." You could hear the sarcasm in Shrek's voice. "What we need are directions back to Far Far Away." "What's with the "we"? Who said I was going with you?" Artie asked, looking at Shrek like he was crazy. "Oh, I did! Cause there's a lot of people counting on you, so don't try to weasal out of it!" "If it's such a great job, why don't you do it?!" Artie said back and Shrek frowned at him. "Understand this kid, it's no more Mr. Nice Guy from here on out!" He warned him. "Oh, so that was you Mr. Nice Guy?" Artie talked back and Shrek replied; "I know.. and I'm going to miss him." "You know what? Why don't you go terrorize a village? And leave me alone!" Artie told Shrek and I said; "Artie!" "Oh, is that some kind of crack about orges? You get your royal highness back to Far Far Away, before I kick it there!" Shrek threatened. "Now, which way am I kicking?" He asked Merlin and I stiffled a laugh. "Oh, I could tell you. But since you’re in the midst of self destructive rage spiral it would be karmic-ly irresponsible." "...What...?" I said, completely confused. "Self-destructive ra- look! Are you gonna help us or not?" Shrek asked Merlin and he answered; "Most definitely, but only after you take the journey to your soul." He said, dramatically. "Yeah, I don't think so." Shrek said, shooting the suggestion down. "Look pal, it's either that, or some primal scream threapy!" Mr. Merlin said, then he began to scream and Shrek covered his mouth. "Alright, alright, journey to the soul." He said, in an unenthusiastic way. 

Later on that night, we all were sitting around a fire and then Mr. Merlin told us to look into the fire. He threw some dust into the flames, making them blow and the smole went up into the air. Donkey was the first one to go and he was just basically seeing food. Then, Shrek went next and when he did, I noticed how he looked, before he blew whatever he saw away. "I see a rainbow pony.." He said, obviously lying. "Excellent work!" Mr. Merlin, exclaimed with a smile. "Now, the boy." I looked up at Artie, as he held my hand. "This is lame.." He muttered then, Mr. Merlin smacked him in the head. "You're lame! Just go for it!" Mr. Merlin told him and then he threw some dust into the fire. "Okay.. there’s a baby bird and a father bird sitting in a nest." Artie said, as he started. "Yes, yes, stay with it! Stay with it!" Mr. Merlin cheered. "Wait, the dad just flew away. Why did he leave the little bird all alone?" All of us began to watch, as he got into it. "It’s trying to fly, but it doesn’t know how to. It.. it’s gonna fall!" When he was done, he looked us, as we looked at him, with shocked looks. "Whew, proper head case you are, aren’t you? Really messed up.. Whoa!" Mr. Merlin said, as he walked away for a moment. "Yeah, yeah, okay! I get it! The bird’s me. My dad left... so what?" "Artie.." I said, softly, hugging his arm. Shrek then walked over to us and sat next to him. "Look Artie...um.." All of sudden, we all heard music and we slowly turned to Mr. Merlin. "Just thought I might help set the mood! Y’know for your big heart to heart chat!" We all stared, until he turned off the music. "I know what it’s like to not feel ready for something." Shrek told Artie and he looked at him. "Even orges get scared.. you know.. once in a while." " I know you want me to be king... but I can’t. I’m not cut out for it and I never will be, alright?" He said and I moved a strand of hair from his face, kissing his cheek. "Even my own dad knew I wasn’t worth the trouble." Artie said, looking a little sad. "He dumped me at that school the first chance he got and... I never heard from him again." "My dad wasn't really the fatherly type either.." Shrek told him. "Well, I doubt he was worse than mine.." Artie said. "Oh yeah? My father was an orge, he tried to eat me." We both looked at Shrek and I raised an eyebrow. "Now, I guess I should have seen it coming. He used to give me a bath in barbecue sauce and put me to bed with an apple in my mouth." Shrek said and Artie chuckled, making me smile. "Ok, I guess that's pretty bad." He said, as he poked at the fire.

"You know, it may be hard to believe what with my obvious charm and good looks, but people used to think that I was a monster. And for a long time, I believed them. But after awhile, you learn to ignore the names that people call you and you just trust who you are." Artie smiled. "You know, you're ok, Shrek. You just need to do a little less yelling and use a little more soap." He said to the orge and I giggled. "Thanks, Artie." "The soap's because you stink.. really bad." Artie clarified and Shrek replied; "Yeah.. I got that." "Oh! Everyone, we forget one person, the girl." Mr. Merlin said, as he looked to me and threw some dust into the flames. "Now, what do you see?" He asked me and I looked into the flames. "Um.. I see a girl and a boy.. standing together and it looks like they're holding hands." Artie looked into the fire as well, smiling. "It looks like they're growing up together.." I said, as I watched the two figures get taller. Then, I saw a crown appear on each of their heads and I gasped a little. "Oh wow.." I stood up and grabbed my bag. "I'm gonna go look for a hotspring." I told them. "There's one right down the trail, on your right." Mr. Merlin said, as he went back inside. Without me noticing, Donkey and Puss were pushing Artie to come with me. "Um.. Dezzy?" I turned to him and smiled. "Yes, Artie?" "D-d-do you m-mind if I c-come with you?" I giggled, when he stuttered and I took his hand. "C'mon." I said, as we walked down the forest trail and then we found the hot spring. 

"Wow.." Artie said, as he gazed at the hot water. I smiled, as I got undressed and then Artie turned around. "What's the matter?" I asked him and he kept his back to me. "I've never seen you.. n-naked.." He said and I giggled, turning him around. "You're so beautiful.." He told me and I blushed. "Thanks Artie.." I smiled, as I got into the warm water and then I looked up at Artie. "You coming?" He nods, as he got undressed and joined me. "So, did you really mean it, when you said you loved me or was it just for show?" Artie chuckled. "It was for show." He said, jokingly and I raised an eyebrow. "Artie.." "You know, I love you, Dezzy." He said and I smiled, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I love you too." He then kissed me, wrapping his arms around me. When I felt his hands roam me and slowly parted from him. "Are we gonna do this?" I asked and he nodded, biting his lip. I smiled and then we kissed again, as we went on our merry way. 

~ I'll leave the rest up to your imagination ;) ~