FALLING AROUND YOU ➵ DANIEL SEAVEY ➵ SEQUEL

24 ➵ A Different Kind of Soulmate

"Love is stronger than death, even though it can't stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries it can't separate people from love. It can't take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death."

—

"You know, the last time I was in a hospital, I was here because of your car crash,"Daniel admitted. By now, we were both back in the waiting room, where everything started.

I stared at him a bit, "Really? I though you would be here for Lavender's birth," I was a bit confused.

He shook his head, still not looking in my direction. "Ever since I saw you in that hospital bed, bruised and also lifeless, I've never wanted to step foot in a hospital again. So, when all the guys went over to the hospital to meet Lavender, I couldn't go. It just– it brings back too many awful memories."

"But you're here now," I countered.

"Because I'm here for you," he spoke quickly finally looking in my direction.

I've still felt a burn of guilt because of his reply. I know I love Daniel, but I can't help but rethink the words in Charlie's letter. He loved me, but I didn't love him back. I don't know how to interpret his words without feeling like our story should've ended differently. It starting to make me feel like I should've loved him, like I shouldn't have made him suffer in another way.

Was the possibility of his death the reason for the reconsideration of my feelings? Pitiful. The only reason I would think that maybe my feelings for Charlie wasn't platonic was just because he could have been on his death bed. He doesn't just deserve to be considered, but he deserves to be chosen. He doesn't deserve me because I didn't pick him.

I picked Daniel.

And, there next to me was where the blues eyes sat down, looking forward, unaware of my constant glances. He was the one that calmed me down from a panic attack. He was the one that stood by my side in the hospital, even if it gave him unnerving anxiety just to be in this room. Against all odds thrown by the universe, he stood his ground, all because he loved me.

"Thank you," I spoke.

My 'thank you' had the same meaning of I love you at this moment, and I think he knew that too. It just didn't feel right to say those words right now. My heart held too much grief and worry for Charlie's future to say any words that hold such an uplifting tone.

It almost felt like cheating that Daniel was here. I couldn't shake off that feeling. Charlie and I were never together, but he loved me. He saw the person he loved with another man; I know the feeling. It breaks you. It's like your in an ocean and drowning. The person you love is watching from the surface, unfazed by your pain, but you don't drown. You just feel like you are. The suffering doesn't go away. You'll feel the swollen lump in your throat over and over again as you try to reach for air forever. It stripes you of your humanity until your left with insanity.

Unrequited love drowns you, but you just have to reach for the surface, even if you have to do the battle alone.

He adored me, yet I couldn't give him the same attention back. I was in love with another. I'm still in love with another, but I can't help feeling the everlasting guilt close up on me in the waiting room. It didn't matter if I went outside for a taste of fresh air or if I snuggled into Daniel's comforting arms. The only person that could stop the drowning was ironically Charlie.

I wouldn't stop drowning until I knew he was okay.

I felt dawn turn to dusk. Time wasn't really relevant in my mind at the moment, and I only stood up a few times to use the restroom, but still, I went back to the same chair. The boys left at one point, I didn't really notice their absence, but they came back once darkness hit. Zach pulled a small blanket over my shoulder with a comforting smile while Corbyn put a small book in my lap.