Learning to Love the Other Side

Nightmares (Josie)

The sun dipped just below the horizon, causing the remaining daylight to cease for the day. Josie took the darkness as a sign to head home. She couldn't fathom staying in the tents overnight with the wounded soldiers. There was something increasingly disturbing and horrific about the medical tent at night. Sure, it was terrible during the day, but at night... Josie shuddered. The blood curling cries for mercy, the mumbling chorus of men delirious from war injuries, and the smell of death, blood, and dirt did not mix well with the darkness. The war was gruesome, and Josie was convinced a twisted person could create an epic horror novel about just the medical tents and the wounded soldiers alone. 

Josie's stomach still felt queasy, and her legs still wobbled a bit as she walked. She feared going to bed that night, for worry she would have nightmares about her first day as a volunteer nurse. Josie chided herself for being so weak when it came to war injuries and dealing with death. She needed to be strong in order to help these men, and today she was not. Josie was conflicted, though, because shouldn't one not be calloused to death and suffering? She didn't want to lose her caringness, but maybe it was the only way to effectively function throughout this bloody war? To become calloused and mechanical. 

These were the thoughts that plagued Josie's mind, along with the young man that had passed away holding her hand. No matter how hard she focused, she couldn't get the image of the boy's lifeless stare out of her head. It was uncanny how a person could be so alive at one moment and then dead the next. Life was so unfair.

Josie rounded the corner and immediately spotted her small, but comfortable home. The humble home was situated just on the outskirts of the city and contained two bedrooms, a cramped kitchen, one bath, and a living room. The house was old and needed a bit of work, but it was home and it kept her warm at night.

"Hi Papa," Josie greeted, forcing a tired smile across her lips. 

Josie's father was nearing his forties, but he was still as bright and almost as strong as he was in his thirties. He had dark brown hair like Josie (though starting to grey), wrinkles in the creases of his eyes from smiling so often, kind brown eyes, and a thin but sturdy build. 

"Hi, sweetie. You look exhausted, want some coffee?"

Her father was sitting at the table, working on a watch and sipping coffee, like he did most nights. Her father owned a small watchmaking and repair shop, and he loved his business second to Josie. He had told Josie on several occasions that the reason he loved watchmaking and repair so much, was because he loved fixing broken things. Josie wished at the moment that she could fix the broken soldiers wounded in battle like her father fixed broken watches.

"I think I'll probably just go to bed tonight. I'm extremely exhausted and I don't think my eyes will stay open much longer," Josie replied, yawning as she spoke. 

Her father seemed to be studying her with his kind, brown eyes. 

"A little spooked by what you saw today, Josie?" her father asked knowingly. 

Josie sighed sadly, "Yes."

"It was terrible, Papa. A boy, probably younger than me, died today. The doctor had to amputate his leg and... he didn't make it. So many boys and men were hurting inside of that tent, it- it was awful," Josie buried her face in her father's chest and cried. 

Her father pat her back in hopes to comfort her a bit. Ever since Josie's mother had passed, George had had to raise Josie. 

"I'm sorry, Josie. Are you sure you'd rather not bake goods or spend the day in the sewing circle with the other ladies?"

Josie abruptly pulled away from her father.

"Absolutely not. If today taught me anything at all, it is that those men need help. I won't give up on them," Josie said decisively. 

"I'll continue to attend the sewing group to make bandages and clothing for the soldiers, but my priority is the medical tent. I feel like it's where I'm called to be."

George gave Josie a hug before letting her go. 

"You're very much like your mother, you know that? She would be very proud of you right now," her father said proudly. 

Josie's heart swelled a bit. She had never met her mom because she had died giving birth to Josie, but she knew her Ma had been a wonderful person. Her father had told her many stories of her mother, and she aspired to be like her. 

"Thanks, Papa. I'll be up in time to make you breakfast and pack you lunch before I leave in the morning. Goodnight."

Josie shut the door to her tiny bedroom and prepared for bed. She hated wearing corsets and had oftentimes thought about going without one. But Lord knows she wouldn't hear the end of it from the church ladies or any lady from that matter. She didn't really want the scandal of not wearing one. At eighteen, she was too old not to be wearing one. 

After Josie had finished getting ready for bed, she climbed into her sheets and blew out her lamp.

The dark, for the first time since she was little, was terrifying. 

She tossed and turned the entire night, distorted images of the boy flooding her brain. 

Josie woke up with a start, just as the sun was rising. She rubbed her throbbing temple and forced herself out of bed. She had slept absolutely awfully last night, and despite being utterly exhausted, she was glad to be awake. It meant she wasn't dreaming about the boy anymore.

Josie had prepared breakfast, didn't eat much because she lacked an appetite after her night terrors and yesterday's events, and headed out the door with an extra pep in her walk. She had stashed a couple of muffins in her basket for Mrs. Green as well. She was determined to make the day a better one, no matter what she faced. She said a quick prayer to God (Josie was a devout Baptist), and made her way towards Mrs. Green's house. 

Mrs. Green was a sweet, widowed elderly woman whose son just left for war. She hadn't much family (most of her family resided in the South), and she struggled to take care of herself. So Josie made sure to help Mrs. Green do her shopping, help with cleaning, and keep her company when she had the time.

"Hello, Mrs. Green!" Josie greeted, a genuine smile on her lips.

"Hi dear. Come on in and make yourself at home."

***Are you guys enjoying Josie's character? Did you enjoy the chapter? If yes, please vote and comment! Thanks for reading :)***