𝘄𝗵𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗻𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁, 𝑛𝑐𝑡'𝑠 𝑙𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑏𝑜𝑦

⇛ 𝗁𝗎𝗆𝖺𝗇

Everyone thinks that an idol is like emotionless, that because they are famous or are going to, they don't deserve to show emotions. Daewon thought that he needed to keep his emotions and struggles inside of himself.
He convinced himself he needed to act like a person who didn't have emotions, who wasn't human.

He was going to debut soon, he was working really hard to show his skills to the fans and the people who were waiting for NCT's debut.

But the young boy couldn't stop the stress and anxiety growing inside of him as many thoughts were present in his head. Daewon was doubting his own self and his capacities, he was terrified that he wouldn't be good enough for the group.

That wasn't his fault to think like this, his past has been rough with him, he completely lost hope in many things even if his best friend tried to help him.

Daewon tried to think different about himself when he arrived in SM entertainment, he tried not to look at himself like he wasn't good enough. He tried so hard without succeeding, the small voices in his head telling him heartbreaking words.

He found himself in the practice room at 3 AM, the seventh sense playing on loop as he went through the choreography again and again. He was looking at his movements in the mirror, finding himself gross and idiotic. The boy tripped before falling down on his ass, a groan escaping his lips as he started to give up.

"Dae ?"

He looked up to see Ten looking at him with worry in his eyes.

"Yes hyung ?" He asks politely.

"Shouldn't you be at the dorm asleep ?" The older boy questions.

"Well.. shouldn't you be too?"

Ten sighed knowing he wouldn't have an answer, he walks to the boy before sitting in front of him. He looks at the dark haired boy and frowns noticing the sweat and paleness of his skin.

"I couldn't sleep so I decided to take a walk, I found myself walking here and saw the light on. Then I came up here and found you." He explains to the boy who nods "Wonie, what's wrong ?"

"I'm fine hyung." He says with a small smile.

Ten huffed at the boy, knowing perfectly that he was lying.

"You can try again, without lying to me."

The younger one sighs knowing that his hyung wouldn't let him go like this.

"Do you think I'm good enough to debut?" He asks quietly.

"Why would you think that way ?" He questions the boy before going on "no but seriously Dae you're absolutely amazing, your dance skills are really impressive and your soft honey vocals are so soothing and beautiful."

"I didn't think of myself like that.." he whispers.

"Do you really think that you shouldn't show emotions ? That you are some kind of robot since you're going to be an idol ?" Ten asks once more, knowing how Dae's real feelings.

"Well.. maybe ? I mean people would think that because we are famous, have money, are known we shouldn't show sadness or tiredness or else." He explains his point of view.

"Daewon, you have feelings and emotions like everyone. You are human and of course it's normal to feel insecure, scared, sad and tired. But it's better to feel happy, energetic and confident. You are your own person, only you can judge yourself." Ten adds making the younger look at him.

The boy smiles a little at the words his hyung used, Ten always showed a side of himself totally not serious but he owns a heart made of gold and he's kind.

"Why don't we go back to the dorm ? If Taeyong wakes up and sees that we're not in the dorm he's going to flip." Ten says smiling.

"Very true indeed, let's go back." Daewon adds chuckling.

They both made their way back to the dorm, walking side by side and laughing at some stuffs. Finally arriving in the warm comfort of their dorm, Daewon gave puppy eyes to his hyung, wanting to sleep in the same bed with him.
The two dancers felt asleep after Ten said many things to the younger one, making him feel good and better.

That night, Daewon thought about his future idol life, still stressing but comforted by the idea of him being his own judge.

note : as we live in a society where a lot of people think that because 
idols are famous and have a (lot) of money they shouldn't complain when they have problems or else I wanted to show it.

Daewon x Ten chapter

I'm currently writing two parts for Dae and currently writing a lot for the other books.
I finished la Casa de Papel already sooooo yup..

reminder to all of you : stay safe, stay healthy, you're strong and beautiful. 💚