LGBT+ Naruto Stories

Trans Zabuza and Haku: Take it Slow

A/N: This is not a romantic story!! it is v platonic and somft with cuddling,,

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It was after their relationship had gone from awkward reverence to a playful partnership that Haku finally inquired about the symmetrical, crescent moon scars on Zabuza's chest. They had tucked into a hotel bed for the night, the first night inside a building in a long time, so spirits were light. Zabuza sighed, holding Haku's gaze through eyes half-lidded with sleep.

"I used to have breasts. These are from the removal surgery."

Haku's eyebrows hit his hairline.

"Go ahead and ask."

"What?"

"I can tell from your face when you're curious." He poked Haku in the stomach, causing him to curl in and giggle. "Your big bug eyes get even bigger."

Haku moved back to his original position, laying on his side with his arm tucked under his head in a mirror of Zabuza. "Okay, how did you get breasts? Was it some jutsu?"

"No. I grew them at puberty, just like all the other...girls..."

Haku cocked his head in a movement resembling a bird's. "What do you mean?"

"You know. Like how you were before you started telling people you were a boy."

"You're like me?"

"Yes." His voice sounded burdened.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's not a part of my past that I broadcast. I want to forget about it." Zabuza rubbed one of his eyes with the back of his hand, a gesture that was almost cute. "You know how you've always been a boy, just, because of the way you dress and the way you look and your medical records, people don't see that you're a boy?"

Haku nodded. He leaned closer to Zabuza, a sign that he was growing tired. When they were lucky enough not to have to take shifts Haku always sought out Zabuza's warmth.

Zabuza responded by laying his arm over Haku's back and pulling him closer. "It wasn't like that for me," he continued. "I thought I was a girl for a long time, until after my breasts grew in. And when I found out I was a boy I wanted to look like a boy. My breasts made me look like a girl, so I had to get rid of them. A lot of trans guys feel the same way."

Haku wrapped his arm around Zabuza. The poor boy was shivering, from cold or from the conversation. Zabuza pulled him flush against his chest, so his head was resting snugly under Zabuza's chin, and rubbed his back gently.

"I'm going to grow breasts?" Haku said as if his statement was a question.

"Most likely. If you want to go on hormones to prevent it we can—"

"I don't want hormones."

"When you get your period, you might want something."

Haku held him tighter.

"Pretend I didn't say that."

"Can we worry about this later?"

"Yes."

Neither spoke for a moment. Haku broke the silence, in a voice that was barely audible. "Is it alright to not feel good about this?"

The shinobi response is no, you should feel nothing, especially with something as trivial as gender presentation and one's body's natural changes. Zabuza was not about to tell another trans person that.

"Yes. I knew what I wanted and I got it. I can't imagine being in your situation. Feel free to take it slow, if you want to experience the things I'm talking about before you decide to take meds or get surgery or not—I'm behind you."

"If my body makes me not be able to protect you anymore, I'll have to do something about it."

He was so tense. He was clearly forcing his voice not to shake. Zabuza knew what he was going through, the hard, painful decision to choose between his body or his cause.

Zabuza stroked Haku's little back, trying to let him relax. "Like I said. Let's take it one day at a time."

"...Okay."

"Go to sleep now."

Haku pulled a pillow under his head and wormed his freezing toes between Zabuza's leg and the mattress. Zabuza smiled.

I'm a boy, not a girl. How many times had he heard Haku say that, without an ounce of frustration in his voice? He never thought he would look up to someone so young, but Haku's serenity was admirable. He wore whatever he felt like. If someone misgendered him, he politely corrected them. Zabuza, even when his flat chest was on display for all to see, still was mistaken for a girl. He growled and showed his teeth, because he had worked so hard for this body.

And Haku would pipe up, "My master is a man." To potential clients, he'd add, "didn't you read his bingo book entry?"

He can stand up for himself, of course, but Haku doesn't just defend, he takes a bite out of the offender. A quality a swordsman would be proud of.

Zabuza longed for freedom like Haku's. He wouldn't mind wearing feminine clothes again. He'd like to sing, to giggle, to not have to care if his actions were too feminine. He wanted to not feel endangered if he wanted to do something motherly—womanly--like kiss Haku goodnight and hum him a lullaby.

But it was Haku, and Haku wouldn't mind.

Zabuza pressed his lips to the crown of Haku's head. The boy's arm tightened around Zabuza's body.

He had never been sung lullabies, but he knew war songs that Kisame used to sing to the Hoozuki brothers to lull them to sleep. The wind blew off the water, and we slice it with our blades... the second line was inappropriate, and would always make Suigetsu laugh as a five year old dragged along on deadly missions.

Zabuza hummed the tune slowly. He had to take deep breaths to keep the melody, he was exhausted, but he didn't stop until Haku's tiny protective grip went slack.