The Way of the Sea

Chapter Seventeen: Muir

Aidan's drenched clothes clung to him as he stood shivering on the shore, allowing the frigid ocean water to rush over his feet until the sun had fully broken above the waves. He had grown numb by the time the cold daylight flooded the world, or at least his dreary corner of it, mocking the teardrop that still clung to his clenched jaw. If he had felt overwhelmed an hour ago when she'd left, it was nothing compared to how he felt now.

Out of everything running through his head, the only thought that made sense was the one he was trying to block out: that the Scáth had intended for this to happen and had baited Eden into her hands. And he let it happen.

How on earth had he let his emotions get the best of him? This anger--where did it even come from? He said so many things he didn't even know he felt.

But do I really feel that way? He squeezed his eyes shut. I don't even remember everything I said.

What he did remember taunted him like a growing shadow in the midst of a dense fog.

You'll be no different!

A whisper of gloom.

You're so selfish!

A swelling darkness.

We were wrong!

An all-consuming night.

His breathing hitched and he let out a tearless sob that nearly made him sick.

"Sorry — I'm so sorry." He shoved his wet hair away from his face. His eyes ached when he opened them. A yawn overtook him; his body's attempt to relax the tension in his chest and throat. It ended in a wheezing cough. Aidan reached across his chest to massage his neck, willing anxiety into submission.

Bonnie had wandered back to him, the puffins forgotten. She tilted her head at him and whimpered.

Every wave that swelled at his ankles tempted him to dive back into the water and keep searching. Because — how could he go back empty-handed?

But his hour of effort to find her had been fruitless, and something told him that it would stay that way.

He felt a splash next to him and he looked down to see Bonnie staring up at him, her whispy auburn fur shadowing her eyes. She nudged his clammy leg with her nose and he brushed his fingers over the top of her head.

Forsaking his resolve, he turned his back on the sea and dragged his feet to the house. Bonnie stayed so close to him he almost tripped. But he was thankful for her presence; without her, he might have kept walking into oblivion.

Eden had left the front door cracked in a hurried escape, but it still creaked when Aidan opened it fully. It didn't take long for his eyes to adjust to the dim light of the living room. The house slept, unaware of the events that had transpired and the inner battle that was raging within him.

One glance up the stairs and Aidan knew he would not rest through what remained of the sleepy morning. Besides, day was coming and the house would be awake soon.

Aidan's tired gaze followed his feet as he walked past the living room and paused at the doorway of the kitchen. He turned and leaned his back against the threshold, covering his face with his hands as he sighed. His breathing had finally returned to normal. The least he could do was have coffee prepared for everyone when they awoke. Then he would have to explain to Fredric how his daughter was missing...

"You're alone?"

Aidan looked up, startled. Merida stood at the sink, leaning most of her small frame against the counter as if it was all she could do to stand. He hadn't noticed her there before. Her back was to him as she stared through the small, foggy window that faced the sea. Her question had been more of a statement than a question.