if i told you | muke

28 ► Colourless

The days were kind of grey, it was almost like the colours had faded out of his life, just like Luke's colourless skin. Michael couldn't explain how much he missed his laugh, his comments, his kiss. The emptiness nagged at him, though meanwhile he had gotten better and better at hiding those feelings for the rest of the world. Still, the knowledge that Luke was still in life danger hurt like hell.

Michael felt like Luke had been away for a year, though had only been nine weeks. Time went slower than ever and he wished there was some sort of an escape of reality but there wasn't. He kind of felt like Bella in Twilight when Edward had left. No matter how much he wanted Luke to come back to him, he wouldn't, nothing could take him back.

On some days it would still be too hard to hide it all, there were moments Michael randomly ran out of class to cry in the bathroom because Luke took over his head again. Knowing that he could die at any moment devastated him, it tugged at his heart continuously and it just didn't stop. He felt like he was a dying a bit on the inside as well.

He felt some tears welling up again when he had been staring at a random wall during lunch break for about twenty minutes. Everyone around him was talking and laughing and he felt like he was a small grey spot in a world of colour. He heard the monotone sound of the monitor in his head again, what if that happened again and it wouldn't be some stupid mistake? What if everyone had been right all the time and Luke would eventually die? He softly hummed the song for Luke while the sound of people in the cafeteria overpowered his voice so that no one could hear.

I wish I could have made you stay, and I'm the only one to blame. I know that it's a little too late, this is everything I didn't say.

He sighed deeply and stared down at his hands.

"Michael!" he heard a sudden voice. He was snapped out of my thoughts and looked up to see Calum running towards him with his phone in his hand. "It's Luke, he-" he took a moment to catch his breath. Michael felt like his insides all turned around inside of his body.

"What do you mean? Did he... die?" he whispered as soon as Calum stood right in front of him. He felt my breathing get heavier and the same feeling overwhelmed him as the time where he thought he died when he sat beside him.

He felt himself getting sick, that couldn't be real. Though Calum didn't nod at him. Suddenly all Michael's blood rose to his cheeks, the amount of adrenaline in his veins unbearable.

All Calum had to was shake his head but Michael barely saw it, already rushing off.