The Wired Man

28

Personal Entry: The Wired Man

"Hi, hon."

Carissa appeared from across the link. Her smile shot me with sadness and sucked all the air out of my lungs. I tried to fight back the sudden flash of emotion, but tears cascaded from both my eyes.

"You had me worried."

"I'm sorry."

Her smile melted to a stern slit. "What happened? I checked with your work, but they said you never came in."

"Baby, I don't have much time."

"What's going on?"

I looked out the car window. The barricade of armed men surrounding me was making their way closer. I locked the doors.

"I don't think I'll be coming over tonight for dinner."

"What's wrong?"

My eyes gushed with what remaining tears I still had left. "I'm so sorry."

The color drained out of her cheeks, making them a pale pink. She pressed her fingers into her temples. "Aaron? What's going on?"

I wiped my face with the sleeve of my shirt. "I don't know if I'm going to see you again, so if I don't, I want you to know that you were the closest thing I ever had-"

"I don't understand."

"I don't have time to explain."

I glanced out the window again. The men had backed away and now a man with a loudspeaker in his hands came out from the hostile crowd.

"I want you to know. I think I love you and I think you love me too," I said.

She sat stone cold and let her hands drop to her sides. Her eyes froze on mine and she held her breath.

"You can't do this," she whispered.

I felt a surge of longing, and I reached out toward her. "I will do whatever it takes, you understand. Whatever it takes to see you again, but if I don't, I want you to know that I loved you."

I felt my entire body go cold, and I grabbed the seat in front of me and pulled back with all my weight. I wanted to break something. I wanted to lie down and die. The leather slipped and I slammed into the back of the seat.

"Aaron, please," she said.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop saying that!"

The loudspeaker blared something, but it was too muffled for me to make anything out. It didn't matter anyway. I got the jist of it by the looks of things outside.

"Promise me you'll hang on," I said.

Her shoulders steadied and she wiped her cheeks. "I'm coming."

I had no idea what she meant, but I nodded anyway. She held out her arm. I wanted to grab it and pull her into my body. I wanted to stop everything and run to her, to cradle her head on my chest, to tell her it's going to be all right. Instead, darkness swallowed my display, and I shut my eyes. Soon everything would be over.