Jennie
Age Fourteen
My sister is having a baby.
A baby boy, to be exact.
She won't tell me who the father is, but I've heard her scream at him and demand money over the phone.
Since Joohyun doesn't know anything about babies, I checked out books from the library for her, receiving quite the curious look from the assistant librarian. Joohyun threw them across the room and said she'd know how to take care of her baby when he got here. So, I took them to my room and read them myself.
Someone in this house needs to be educated on what to do with a newborn.
Sam's visits are limited now. All they do is argue when he comes over. Him not coming around makes me sad. He is nice to me and helps me with my homework. He cares about my interests and never tells me my dreams are stupid. Sam is who I want my father to be.
A month later, Sam stops coming over permanently.
**
Age Fifteen
"Hey there, stranger."
My head flies up at the sound of the voice I've missed.
Sam stands in my doorway, looking clean-cut in a suit and with a ball cap over his head. It's rare seeing him without a hat on.
"Hi," I answer in surprise, unable to hide my excitement. "Long time no see."
He has been nonexistent in our lives for nearly a year. I thought he was gone for good, so the sight of him brings nothing but joy to my face. He's never met Mingsoon, who came into the world three months ago. He did send a care package with no return address. A note was attached, saying he wanted Mingsoon to have the baby essentials.
"Sorry about that," he answers. "Life gets in the way sometimes."
I nod, though I don't understand. Something I've come to learn is, if someone wants time with someone, they make it, no matter what. That means Sam didn't want to spend time with anyone in our home—including me.
Having men come and go isn't out of the ordinary. I've never met my father. My knowledge of him is through old photographs and the few choice words my mother shouts when I ask about him.
Sam steps farther into my room. "Your sister said you're very helpful with Mingsoon."
The baby books I read have been put to good use since I'm Mingsoon's main caretaker. Not his mother. I get up with him at night and change all his diapers, and since she refuses to breastfeed, in fear it will mess up her "good tits," I feed him his formula.
I shrug and hold back the urge to tell Sam that. I want him to be proud of me, but Joohyun will kill me. "I try."
He smiles. "You're such a good girl, Jennie. I'm sure she appreciates your help greatly."
I snort. "Joohyun doesn't appreciate anything."
"That's the understatement of the year."
I tuck my legs underneath my butt. "So then, why do you like her? Why don't you find a nicer girlfriend?"
It's been a while since I've asked him, but I don't understand how a decent man like him can like her. There must be something wrong with him. Broken people seek out other broken people. I see it every day of my life and wonder how I'm ever going to find someone nice to take on the job of being with someone as broken as I am.
He shrugs. "People like people for different reasons."
"You like her because she's pretty ... and she has sex with you."
He chuckles and slides his hands into his pants pockets.
"You two seem so different," I go on.
"Opposites attract sometimes," he argues.
"Duh," I say with a roll of my eyes. "Opposites have sex with each other, but—"
He cuts me off. "You seem to know an awful lot about sex for someone your age."
I point out my bedroom door. "Uh ... have you seen the people I live with?"
He walks into my room and sits down on the edge of the bed, concern now etched on his face. "None of their boyfriends have ever ... they've never touched you or talked to you inappropriately, have they?"
"No," I rush out.
They've looked but never touched.
"You'll tell me if they do, right?"
"Yes."
"You promise?"
"I promise," I say softly.
He gives me a gentle smile. "You know, you're going to make something of yourself when you get older. I'm certain of it."
His words come out with pride.
They fill me with pride.
"Thank you," I whisper. "I want to be a writer when I grow up."
This spikes his interest. I love when he seems interested in me.
"Yeah? What type of writer?"
"I don't know. I like reading the newspapers."
He chuckles. "Whoa. The pay for the amount of work is chump change."
I frown. "Not everything is always about money."
He rubs his hand over his clean-shaven cheek. "If there's anything you learn from me, Jennie, it's that life is always about money."
***
Jisoo
A towel is wrapped around my body after the post-gym shower, and I walk through the living room at the sound of the doorbell. The realization that I'm about to answer my door half-naked doesn't hit me until I'm standing in front of it. I look out the peephole and smile at the sight of Jennie standing at my door, glancing around in annoyance.
As soon as I swing the door open, I lean against the doorframe, leveling my arm above me while a grin plays at my lips. "Hello, my favorite neighbor. Care to borrow some sugar?"
Unfortunately for me, the expression on Jennie's face isn't screaming that she's down for having a good time. Her chin is jutted into the air, and her pretty little lips are pinched together.
A wad of cash is shoved into my chest. "This is for whatever Mingsoon took," she says. "Let me know if it's not enough."
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
I shake my head while ignoring the cash. "I'm not taking your money."
"Why?" she snaps.
"I don't need to give you a reason."
"Bullshit!" She inches the cash further. "Now, tell me how much, Jisoo."
I wave for her to come in, and surprisingly, she does. She crosses her arms as soon as the door shuts.
"Why'd you do it? Why are you being so nice to me, inviting me to your fucking family dinner, and helping my family?"
"I told you, I'm a nice person."
She snorts. "People don't do things to be nice. There's always an underlying reason."
I throw my hands up. "Do I need a reason to be nice to someone? I'm fucking attracted to you, Jennie! I wish I could take what happened between us back every single day. When I see you in the morning, I wonder where we'd be if I hadn't been such a dumb shit then."
This isn't how everything was supposed to go down.
I take a step forward, grab the back of her head, and pull her to me. "Maybe it's time I find out."
