A Lot More Hermitcraft Stuff

Hermit Kids and their parents conversations

listen i got the idea for a confession between Will and his parents and Taylor and his parents and i just got to thinking and suddenly i made tons of parent-kid conversations in my head

Will: hey dad? I uh, kinda like someone...
Iskall: oh? well who's the lucky one?
Will: u-um, it's T-Taylor...
Iskall: *deep inhale* ya know what? I give up. Go confess to him, date him, I don't even care anymore. BUT IF YOU EVER MARRY HIM HE'S TAKING OUR LAST NAME, NO DOUBLE STANDARDS BECAUSE I AM NOT HAVING A KID WITH CONVEX'S LAST NAME
Will: dad what the fuck we're not even dating
Tommy: yet
Will: wait what-

Taylor: hey dads? I think I um... have a crush on someone...
Scar: *gasp* who is it?
Taylor: i- well- it's kinda um... Will...?
Cub: *smirking and holding up a thumbs up* nice choice
Scar: *yelling incoherently in the background* OF ALL THE PEOPLE THAT YOU'RE FRIENDS WITH-
Taylor: i uh, sorry?
Cub: ignore your dad, you made a good choice. Just make sure he treats you good
Taylor: well he did save me from a phantom and walk me back home-
Scar: HE BETTER NOT HAVE A CRUSH ON YOU OR I SWEAR TO GOD IM GOING TO KILL THAT BOY
Cub: SCAR!

(when they were younger, Tommy and Roman had a lot of playdates and their dads would come to watch them)
Grian and Doc: *glaring intensely at each*
Mumbo: uh Grian?-
Grian: hush babe, this is between us
meanwhile, Ren: it's so great that Roman and Tommy are friends!
Iskall: right? They have such a great dynamic!
Doc: scheiße
Ren: wait, what does that mean?
Roman, whispering to Tommy: it means fuck
Tommy: you know whatever language that is?
Roman: german, and yeah
Tommy: teach me every swear word
Roman: only if you teach me curses in swedish
Tommy: deal

Iskall, dragging Will over: HEY MUMBO GUESS WHAT
Mumbo: uh, what? also should i be scared?
Iskall: *nudges Will* tell him!
Will: I uh, like Taylor...
Mumbo: *grinning widely* aww! that's so cute! let's just uh, agree not to tell Grian or things will happen
Will: what things?
Mumbo: your father might actually kill Taylor
Will: alright then, no telling dad

Yewey: hey dad?
Zed: yeah honey?
Yewey: where's the end portal? i wanna kill the enderdragon
Zed: oh, here's a map. Who're you taking with you?
Yewey: im going by myself. Im bored so wanna kill the dragon
Zed: *sigh* you're more like Cub's child than Taylor is...
Yewey: what do you mean?
Zed: remember that game your uncle, Grian, came up with a long time ago? Demise?
Yewey: oh yeah! and those challenges and stuff?
Zed: yeah, well Cub, when he wasn't yet on the dead team, he did those challenges for fun because he was bored
Tango from the kitchen: OH YEAH THOSE THINGS! I BET I CAN FIND SOME VIDEOS
Impulse, about to do laundry: i guess history repeats itself
Zed: guess you could say it's...
Impulse: don't you dare Zed
Zed: inevitable
Tango: im going to kill you Zed

Lucas: you wouldn't
Python: but i would *places down his second-to-last card* uno!
Wels, leaning slightly to peek at Python's cards: *places down uno reverse card* no u
Python: GODDAMN IT WELS
Lucas: *snort*
Python: *tackles Wels*
Wels: PYTHON-
Jevin: *sigh* why do i put up with you two?
Python, now on the ground: YOU KNOW YOU LOVE US JEV
Jevin: *looks over at Lucas* only follow my example alright? these two are morons
Lucas: then why'd you marry them?
Wels and Python: OHHHHHHHH-
Jevin: *exasperated sigh* i forgot you had their genetics as well as mine
Lucas: and who's fault is that?
Jevin: i swear to god-

(if this ever happened:)
Will and Taylor: ... we're dating
Mumbo: *quaintly clapping* congratulations!
Iskall: *tired smile* congratulations i guess...
Grian: *gremlin glare* you wHAT?!
Cub: *smirking* nice👌
Scar: *incoherent yelling*
Will and Taylor: uhhhh
Scar and Grian: IM GOING TO KILL YOU BOTH
Iskall: *mouthing* run

in conclusion, Grian and Scar are going to kill their sons if they ever find out they like each other, Iskall has given up, Cub and Mumbo are proud dads, Jevin's done with his entire family, and ZIT is still a chaotic mess