Filter (Kim Namjoon X Readers)

Chapter 30

A desert in your throat. The sun was beaming down onto your face but you didn't want to wake up. Two things might have happened last night as you were unconscious. One, Jaehyun had accomplished his task and you were tossed somewhere in the city after he had his fun with you. However, since your hands were feeling the soft mattress underneath, it meant that you were still indoor. Maybe you were still on his bed. Or the second scenario, you were saved.

Mustering up all of your courage, you opened your eyes to the familiar curtains and awards pinned to the wall. This is your room and somehow, you made it back alive. In the kitchen, you found that your mother hadn't gone off to work yet despite it being passed her reporting time.

Your mother sensed that you were in the room, and began plating breakfast. When she turned around with a smile on her face, it made you panic even further. She sat the plates on the island and began digging in. The fork stayed on the counter as you watched her eat.

"What's wrong?" she asked. "Do you not want eggs?"

"No," you replied slowly. "I mean, shouldn't you be yelling at me right now?"

She placed her fork down gently next to her plate, "I had planned on doing it. I never thought the day would come when I see you coming home drunk at a club. But then I realized it was partly my fault. Y/N, I know the break up was hard on you and I thought giving you space was the best idea but I see now that letting you bottle things up on the inside is harmful. So while I am upset with you, I still love you and I still trust you. Just please, talk to me more about how you feel, alright?"

"Yes, eomma. I'm sorry. Next time a break up happens, you'll be the first person I come to. But how did I get home last night?"

"Kim Seokjin and Jung Hoseok took you home. They told me not to worry and the person responsible for your drunken state would be punished accordingly."

"I see," you nodded, unsure of what that meant or why they had done that in the first place. There was no reason for them to care about you but you could have sworn that you heard Namjoon telling you he loves you. You dismissed it, believing that it was the drug making you hallucinate everything. Kim Namjoon is incapable of love.

As you continued to eat breakfast, your phone rang. Both your mother and you gave cautious looks before you picked it up. "Hello?"

"I'm glad you're awake!" the voice exclaimed.

"What do you want, Seokjin?"

He exhaled, your indifference voice towards him was understandable. "I just wanted to make sure that you're okay. And we need to talk. So meet me at Tae's cafe in at noon. Do you know where it is or should I send the address?"

"I know where it is." you answered flatly. But you didn't know why you did because it sounded like you had agreed to this ridiculous meeting. That's the answer Seokjin took and he hung up before you could say anything else.

"I'll call the cops if you don't come back," your mother reassured.

***

Tae's cafe exclusively does not sell any coffee. He despises the drink and will kick out anyone who asks for it. Namjoon mentioned it before, and thinking about it now brought back more bitterness than coffee ever can. The group of boys saw in the far corner of the spacious cafe that was overflowing with paintings, flowers, and jazz music. They all straightened up when you sat down. 6 boys on one side while you were on the other, like some sort of interrogation.

"I know you don't want to be here but thank you for coming," Seokjin began.

"Well, my mom told me you and Hoseok took me home, so I just wanted to come and thank you. And whatever you need me to do, I'll do it. I don't want to owe you any favors for the future."

Seokjin and the rest of them sighed. It felt terrible that you would assume they had ulterior motives, but then again, you had every right to feel that way after what they did. "We do have a favor," he commented. "Namjoon doesn't know we're here. In fact, he would kill us if he knew. We just want you to listen to us, the full story. And whether you choose to believe us or not is entirely up to you."

"Alright, go on."

Taehyung cleared his throat. "It was my idea, I wanted to play some sort of game for senior year. And it was me who suggested that we choose you as our target. Namjoon hyung stepped in and made it clear that he would be the person to do it because you had already caught his eye. Yes, it started as a sick joke but over time, we all saw how he had fallen in love with you. You changed him, and all of us as well. Because of you, we became a better version of ourselves."

"I haven't done anything for you, Taehyung." you pointed out.

"No, not directly. But seeing the way Namjoon hyung dotes after you, I felt that life was just more than game and that genuine connections can be made." he answered.

"Genuine?" you scoffed. "In case you forgot, he told me that everything he said was a lie. And all of you attested to that."

"Only for your safety," Yoongi chimed in. "What Soo Ji did was revenge because Namjoon didn't return her feelings. And you hid the threats in your locker from him, we all saw that. Namjoon didn't want you to suffer because of him anymore and thought that by doing this, it would turn the bullets away from you. That's why he made you hate him."

"We all agreed to it because we didn't want you to be hurt," Hoseok commented. "But please believe that he still loves you deeply and we care about you. I know we weren't always the best people and we might not deserve your friendship after this, but I hope you can at least forgive Namjoon. All he wanted was to protect you."

"He loves you, noona." Jungkook stated, "And he still does. Just last night, he put that jerk Jaehyun in jail despite doing business with his father. I haven't seen him care so much about someone until you came along."

Jimin nodded, "All the time you that you had spent together, that was the real him. None of it was a lie, he wanted a future with you. Even though it was his decision to separate from you, he's miserable right now. He's barely eating and his health is declining."

That made your heart hurt, the image of his smile no longer being on his face and his dimples going into hiding forever. But you shook that thought away, you shouldn't let them manipulate you anymore. If they are only acting, then they're doing an exceptional job because you started to believe the sweet melodies they're singing. "Why are you telling me all of this now?"

"Because we can't just sit around and let you two drift off when you should be together," Taehyung declared. "I understand that what we did was awful and we don't expect you to forgive us. But just please know that we did care about you so much, especially Namjoon hyung."

You bit back the tears and tried to distract yourself with the jazz playing in the background. Nothing helped. Your brain was putting the pieces together and it almost made sense. That's why he showed up to rescue you last night and that's why he said he loves you. "Thank you for telling me this. Against my better judgment, I believe that you did care about me, to some degree. But it doesn't change the fact that his intention going into it wasn't to date me, it was to dump me in the end. Even if I can forgive him now, I can never trust him again. Nor can I trust any of you, but once again, I appreciate what you did for me last night and for telling me all of this today." You stood up, "Goodbye."

"Noona, wait!" Jungkook called out. Seokjin grabbed his arm.

"It's okay, let her go, she needs time to think about everything."

"And what if she doesn't come back to him?"

"Wouldn't it be better that way?" Seokjin sighed, watching you pushed through the door to leave. "They need to fall first."