written in my sonder eyes
beholds an upside-down view
of the world in intricate details;
i am the emotional, empty soul
covered with poisonous doodles
and tired, broken fingers
held in a desperate fist of anger;
the wound bleeds in my eyes
as i take a glimpse of my life
and i can only find rough patches
of blood and envy peppered
on the faces of my friends;
only i have gotten so far to brush
the tips of my scarred paintbrush
and the proximity of the solution
was shivering in my arms,
but i screamed and yelled until
the monster of envy ran away
because i only focused on the past
instead of the hallucinative present;
now i am lying on the concrete
with throbbing, white knuckles
and the vision of mine ultimately
faded into the depths of the earth
where my loneliness manifested
into something bigger, something bad;
i awoke with a big gasp
yet my mouth was tightly sewn shut
with a red string of hate;
a person formed in the midst of the fog,
threatening with each step
that echoed through the desolate room
and i shook with grief and sorrow;
they injected me with a dagger
until a steady flow of tears
paved its way down to my flesh
and the heart monitor went quiet;
everything had taken its time to heal
but i was left to hurt years ago
and now i am staring at a silhouette
who is clutching my heart in their hands;
ultimately i was the one
stabbing myself in the back
and i was the one who brought
all the insecurities and pain to myself;
is this a way of teaching me?
is this a way of being wise?
-valkyrie
