The Fangirl Who Cried

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Connected to one of the previous stories.

Being stuck in one spot for so long never made me this uncomfortable. Not even during school when the teacher's lectures forced us to sit for so long, listening to meaningless words. 

I still remember all of that. It was hard to shake it away from my head, anyway. All the images, and whatever what was going on.

I remember not being able to see. It was dark and cryptic, and I don't know what to do. As much as I wanted to see what was outside the blindfolds, I was to scared of the idea. Shuddering was the only thing I could do as well, as the rope tied me onto this one chair. The rope and the pain were the only two things I felt during that entire time. Occasionally I would be attentive enough to feel my own blood trickling down my face and limbs.

Valt? Where are you? What's going on? I wanted to ask aloud, knowing too well that what I saw would get me into trouble.  I couldn't risk it, either. My big brother wasn't here.

I was alone with someone. But he wasn't someone I knew. I couldn't even describe him well enough. He became so horrible. But I didn't know that at first, because I didn't suspect him.

But after the ordeal, everything came to me and I then knew everything. To this very day, the ordeal still made me uncomfortable. So much I could possibly cry blood in place of tears. Thinking about him still made me very shook.

Valt? Valt? Still, no words came out of my mouth. 

I was probably there for so long to the point my senses were becoming corrupted. The air was musky and stuffy to my nose, and my mouth so dry I felt like begging for water. My tongue still had the taste of iron on it, no matter how much I tried to get it off myself. I can't tell if I am sweating or if blood was still rolling down. 

Va — I almost mentally called for my brother again. Now I gave up. Now I understood that he would not come for his little sister at all. Tears were brimming from under the blindfolds and I fought them back.

Crying was submission. Crying was feeding the monster.

To us kids, imagination meant everything. At first, when he invited me to his house, I thought it was a dream come true. I thought he genuinely wanted to be with me, and I almost loved him even more than that. But when this happened, I thought it was my imagination. I thought it was a nightmare, and I was in bed. 

And now, I imagined myself explaining to my brother. Valt. You won't believe what happened to me. I don't know how long I was gone for. I can't see anything. I can't do anything. Why do people like doing this to others? Why?...

No, that was a mistake. What I was doing was not going to help the situation. I felt tears come out even more, and I almost hiccuped as well. I gritted my teeth, ignoring how they are also clattering in fear like how I was shivering. 

He could be here right now. The monster could be already back, waiting for me to break down and cry. Seeing me cry was his own enjoyment, and I didn't want to give him that. 

"You know, you could cry," said the calm voice. I almost hiccuped again when he spoke to me. "It's normal for young girls to cry. It's okay."

"No," I gritted my teeth even harder. "Never."

"Why not? It isn't healthy to deny your own feelings. It's okay to be happy. It's okay to be sad. It's okay to be angry. It's okay to be scared. It's okay to be hurting..." his voice kept droning on after that. So much I didn't want to hear what other meaningless comfort he has to tell me.

What did he even turn into? Why was he doing this to me? I thought we were friends.

He was my brother's friend. Even most of Japan liked him. They said he was the most charming boy, whom every girl would swoon for and whom adults would praise him as responsible. But why is this happening? It can't be real. It can't be him.

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