Chamber by Chamber // Snowbaz

S+B

I stopped Ebb and tied her up to a nearby tree. If someone lived in the cottage, maybe they'd spare some food and a place to sleep for the night. But as I neared the cottage and peeked in one of the windows, I saw that the inside was immaculately clean- to the point of borderline nutter. Yet no one was inside. I decided to creep around the building, and as I got to the back, hand rested readily on the hilt of my sword, I saw seven numpties. I felt a tingly feeling in my stomach; I was nervous. (Who wouldn't be nervous? Fucking numpties. There's no known way to kill them.) When I looked closer (still careful to be very bloody quiet), I saw that they were surrounding some sort of glass coffin. (With something - someone - inside it?) As I leaned in, I could hear bits of their conversation.

"P'raps it'd be better to grill-"

"-Roasting may be better,"

"Well he's spelled unconscious, so it won't matter-" Spelled?

"-be flambe?" From what I caught, it sounded like they were planning on eating someone. Not surprising, but not good, either. I could have gone back to Ebb and rode far away from there. But true to form, I could never keep my daft nose out of anything. So I jumped out in front of the numpties, standing taller than I really was. I tried to look confident, but I'm sure I just looked uneasy. (And perhaps constipated.) I s'posed there was no way I could have very well turned back then.

"I, um-" Stop stuttering, Simon. I cleared my throat. "What rights do you have to be on the royal grounds?" They gruffly chuckled and exchanged glances among themselves.

"Miles away from the kingdom, sonnyboy. You're on our grounds, now." I gulped, very showily, I'm sure. Despite wanting to run far, far away from there (see? What kind of prince runs from danger?) I held my ground and stood more confidently.

"I'm the prince, and I'm sure that-" One of the larger ones gasped and interrupted me.

"A prince, eh? Look at 'im, boys! I've never had royal meat before..." He elbowed the numpty beside him and pointed at me. My hair was falling in my face from not having cut it in a bit, which I'm sure didn't help my demeanor.

"Gentlemen, I'm sure we can, erm- come to an... uh- an agreement of sorts, yes?" They all laughed at that.

"I don't think so," The larger one said, moving in closer to me.

"See, we haven't eaten in a very-" Another one started.

"Long time." They moved closer and closer, pressing in on me from all sides. I tried pushing against them to no avail. Just when I thought that I was going to die that way - smushed by fucking numpties of all things - one began to crumble. His friends were startled, but pressed on. But as I looked up, I saw someone agile and thin (and seemingly old- she had a white streak in her hair) hitting each numpty over the head with a... newspaper? Peculiar. When they had all crumbled, she hopped down from the rubble and extended her hand to me.

"Paper beats rock," She smirked. "Fiona." I shook her hand, and decided that if she didn't know who I was already, she didn't need to. No need to mention the prince thing, even if I was dressed in royal linens. (Which I right hated.)

"Simon," She smiled at me a bit and continued on, dragging me to some of the smaller bits of rubble.

"We haven't much time until they reassemble. Help me toss some stones in the river- they can't reassemble if they're missing a few pieces." I didn't trust her very much - it was a gut thing - but I helped her throw pieces of rock in a nearby stream and watched as the current carried them far away. When we were done, she walked back over to the cottage with me and settled beside the glass coffin. I hadn't gone over, yet- I'd been nervous. But watching her stare down at it, I decided to move closer, right beside her.