ENTER: The Magician, and His Assistant. [ PreExam Hisoka x Reader ]

EPISODE EIGHTEEN: Begging x For x Forgiveness

|CHAPTER 18|

BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS

Before the evening, the sky was deceivingly calm. As the sun fell, though, the rain started to fall. Before long, it was a frenzy outside, the outside world being whipped with a torrent so thick it could be mistaken for heavy fog. The wind howled, and flung debris at windows so loud it was mistakable for hail. The low clouds maintained the color of a bruise, green and fading to a melancholic blue. It's a storm uncommon for the late fall months.

[ Y/N ]'s whole day was missing a piece that had become integral in her daily life. In the morning, the sky was heavy with overcast clouds and a light mist fell from them, humid and cold. In school, it was as if she were sitting by a ghost, Hisoka's desk remained empty at her side constantly. In her law class, his gaze was absent from her back from the last row. Her walk home was lonely, and was without banter that she had become so fond of. When had she started to feel like this? Was she that out of touch with herself, so self absorbed? The patter of rain began to fall heavier as she walked back to her secure community. Over the horizon where the clouds were coming from, moving fast, lightning briefly and frequently flared in bursts. Once she reached the inside of her room the full force of the storm broke loose, and the sounds of violent thunder and large, swirling rain filled the otherwise quiet space. Her dull eyes stared dejectedly at the paper in front of her, sitting in darkness in her room. She neglected to turn on the light, transfixed in her own guilt and regret. Her pencil traced circles in the margins, becoming a scribbled mess as she failed to replicate the lines when passing back over them. The rain hitting the windows, flying sideways instead of down, was the only occupying space in her mind. It was numbing, therapeutic. If this was where she wanted to end things, her life would be completely the way it was before, without inconvenience or... fun.

The girl flinched as the switch was turned in her room, suddenly vulnerable in the lighting. Luckily for her, the doorway was behind her and her mother couldn't see the redness rimming her eyes.

"Are you trying to ruin your vision?" Her mother asked cattily, and [ Y/N ] could feel the questioning stare freeze into her neck. "It was pitch as night in here."

"I'm sorry, I suppose I failed to notice." The daughter said, lifting her eyes from the paper. Her stomach started to knot.

"I noticed that boy failed to show up for his tutoring lessons. I take it to mean you finally decided to listen to me?" A hand came to rest on her shoulder, light and cold, without reassurance. "That's good, you've always been smart. I only want what is best for you, and now that your grades are as high as they can be, there's just no reason to continue teaching him."

"Yes," The heiress agreed, absent of tone. "It pleases me that you are satisfied with my work."

The encounter felt off, her mother was trying very hard to be gentle. Was this truly the praise she had sought above all else before? Perhaps she had been just as out of touch with reality as Yulia and Eila, just in a different way. Now that she had begun to realize the potential she possessed in her life, she didn't feel as compensated for her loyalty as before.

"Anyways, I've picked out some dresses for you. Please point out what you like and I will send an order to the bridal shop. We only have a few weeks, after all." The immaculate woman requested, placing a catalogue in front of the girl.

Her [ color ] eyes observed the ivory dresses displayed in bountiful photos before her. She didn't care for them in particular, but a [ type ] dress caught her eye and she pointed to it. The curves the fabric followed sparked some interest in her, but once the photos were taken back, the reason she was upset in the first place returned to her. She had been so horrible.