In the Shadow of His Wings

Chapter 7

- Mengele -

I wake up to seeing (Y/N) resting on my chest. Her breath is going steady and her eyes are tightly closed. I still have my arms wrapped around her.

That little thing, she's really adorable. So young and fresh, so pure and innocent, her skin so soft and firm...

Yes, I am attracted to her. But that can't happen between an Aryan and someone of... her kind, so I probably should kill her. How did it all even get this far?

She started off as just another test object for my studies. And, of course, I had planned on killing her after she served her time for my experiments. Her number was on the death list already, she should have been gassed yesterday.

...if I hadn't crossed her from the list just in time.

Last night, when she snuck into my office... I have to say, that impressed me. She was well aware that she could have been killed out there. But still, she did it – for me. She wanted to see me, even if it's the last thing she attempts to do. That's quite... touching. So I decided to save her.

She's mine. Only mine. And I protect what is mine. Nobody will take her away from me. And if I can't have her, no one else can.

A part of me says: If you want her heart, then cut her open and rip it out of her.

But something keeps me from killing her. I don't know what it is, usually I don't have any scruples doing that. After all, she's just another one of... them. I don't know what's so different about her that I actually see her as human. She is one of them...

But she is not.

But she is.

But she is not...

Ugh, I've never been this torn in my entire life.

And there's another thing that impresses me about her: She has never, never managed to make me seriously angry. Usually, that's not a hard thing to do. I mean, how do these creatures expect me to react when they cause a commotion at the ramp because they desperately want to stay together, even though I said or showed it clearly: You to the left, you to the right... or, even better: When they try to tell me what to do!?

Seriously, some of them need to be taught some manners. Not (Y/N), though. She has always done everything directly on command, without even trying to object to or interrupt my plans. That's how I like it. An obedient young lady.

Yes, I know I'm probably betraying the Reich and the SS by doing this. And yes, I know I'm married. To a pure Aryan woman – Irene.

BUT... First of all, do the Reich and the SS really need to know what I do in my free time? It's none of their goddamn business, to be honest. And about Irene... She's been increasingly going on my nerves during the last months anyway. She is just so over-sensitive about everything – and jealous as hell. She would probably file for divorce immediately if she knew what I'm doing here.

I feel like she has absolutely no idea what war actually means. (Y/N) does, though. I'm pretty sure she's used to death and all the other unpleasant things that come along with war by now. I don't have to hide anything from her.

Irene is not here right now. (Y/N) is. And I want her.

The thought of it alone... her tiny body writhing underneath me while I–

Oh, I need to stop myself, otherwise I won't be able to stay in control anymore. But... actually... since she's already lying on top of me, half-naked, and obviously wanting me too... why shouldn't I take advantage of that?