Warning: Contains smoking, swearing. 492 words. Irregular updates, maybe weekly if you like it?? 21/11/19
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Lucien pov
I sat there. I was tired. Why can't things be simple? I sat on my desk, leaning out my window as I lit my first cigarette of the week, I was trying so hard to cut down but things had got so stressful and I honestly don't care anymore. I had my headphones in, I was listening to Hobo Johnstone - Typical Story... It wasn't my typical music, but people constantly expected me to listen to my chemical romance and black veil brides, I'm sick of being someone else's persona. Sometimes I just need something sad and deep to listen to while I fill my lungs with smoke and briefly lose touch with reality. To not feel for a second. To not have to worry.
"I don't really need much
Just a place to be alone and you won't really see much
I think that I'm invisible, my mirror shows another guy
A guy doesn't do shit, he just sits in his miserable
Everybody's gotta live a life
That they didn't ask for
Why would he put me here just to die?
Just to, just to, die"
I didn't have much to complain about, I didn't have a reason to feel like this, I had a home, a loving father, it's just... I'm sick of hearing people talk shit about my dad, I'm sick of hearing the names, they have no idea how much he's been through, how hard he's fought, I want to punch every one of them, honestly, they don't deserve to breathe... But dad loves me and he'd rather I just stay out of it, not get myself in trouble, I treat him like shit sometimes but honestly, my dad is so fucking strong, I wish I knew myself as well as he did. I'm sick of being a stereotype to people, I'm glad they're all scared of me, I don't ever want to talk to any of them. Emo Boy. Gay. Edgy Twat. I'm not fucking gay! I slowly took the last drag of my cigarette and put it out in the plant pot that sat on my window ledge. I never told dad I smoked but I'm pretty sure by this point he knows. I change out of my skinny jeans and put on my black my chemical romance T-shirt, okay maybe not all the stereotypes are entirely false, I wash off my eyeliner and get ready for bed. I say goodnight to Dracula, my pet snake, before turning out his light and hopping into bed. We have school tomorrow and I literally can't think of anywhere I'd rather be less, but Ernest is there and I miss him, he's got stuff going on at home as well at the moment so I want to help him. Guess I'm not skipping school tomorrow, or at least not alone.
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I'm Not Gay! Am I? | Dream Daddy Fanfic | Lucien x Ernest
FanfictionLucien Bloodmarch is having a hard time at school and is struggling to find himself, his best friend Ernest Vega isn't having an easier time and tension at home is getting hard. Luckily the boys have each other, in a way that may be more than just f...
