UNKNOWN. VMIN

twenty three

NOVEMBER 27, 2019
11:45 pm

          that night when seokjin tried to find taehyung on his own, he actually found him close by, at a bar, getting his ass handed to him.

          he looked so small then, surrounded by a group of delinquents but taehyung looked like he was one of them, as he talked backed and kept throwing insults back at them.

          seokjin grabbed taehyung, startling him as he dragged him out of the bar. taehyung desperately tried to shake him away, only for seokjin to hold him in his place.

          "taehyung, what are you doing?" were seokjin's first words in worry and anger. then, in sudden realization that he has found taehyung who went missing for the past three months, still in one piece, he engulfed him in a hug.

           taken aback, drunken and a little suffocated, taehyung could only stand there, and waited till seokjin finally lets him go.

          "taehyung," seokjin began, holding taehyung's shoulders and looked at him with worried and pleading eyes, "please come home. everyone of us wants you to come home."

          "i don't need everyone of you wanting me to go back there." taehyung shook his head, looking away from seokjin's gaze. "i feel suffocated just by returning here."

          "taehyung, come back—"

           taehyung cuts seokjin off, removing his grip from his shoulders. "i'll leave tomorrow. don't even bother following or finding me."

           with staggering steps, taehyung walks away from seokjin, only to be held back again. "jimin is worried for you," seokjin tries to convince taehyung, as he noticed a fragile and unguarded look on his eyes. "we're all worried. please return to us, taehyung."

          taehyung suddenly softens, hesitation flashing in his eyes, but quickly shaking his head. "hyung," he fretted, "i'm sorry. i can't. i'm not living here at all. it's not your fault."

          "so, you're just gonna die out here?" seokjin questioned, looking at taehyung with pity, "in order to live? taehyung, we're here for you, okay?"

          taehyung shakes his head again, then looks at seokjin in the eyes. "you can't be there for someone who has already lost himself."

          he slowly backs away from seokjin, who continued to plead for him to go back home, and tried to hold him in place. taehyung, wanting to badly escape and to be less of a burden to his hyungs, pushed seokjin away. only to come face to face with his own regrets and confusion and seokjin's shock and fear.

         and as taehyung ran away that night, seokjin could only remember taehyung's agonized expression and the pain of facing the reality of taehyung who has already lost himself, who he wasn't familiar with anymore.

          it would've been better if he hadn't found taehyung that night. it was worse enough that he had seen taehyung but couldn't even bring him back home.

NOTE.

hello heres an update after a boring day n while i wait for bts to perform at mama 2019 (honestly it doesn't feel like mama bc the atmosphere is off??) only 5 more chapters to go:)) #JINDAY💜 (isn't it ironic that it's jin day today n this chapter is abt jin)

EDIT (at like 8:57 pm) BECAUSE BTS WON ALL FOUR MAJOR DAESANGS AT MAMA 2019???,#&$*# AND THEIR PERFORMANCE WAS ON FIRE ! AS ALWAYS! DAMN THEY NEVER DISAPPOINT?! THEY GOT WW ICON, SOTY, ALBUM OTY, AND ARTIST OF THE YEAR!!!! N THEY DESERVE IT!! WELL DESERVE!!! I AM SO PROUD MY ARMY EGO IS BURSTING!! omg i got carried away but i am just so proud of them i love them a normal amount shh🥺