Chasing Yoongi | M.YG x Reader FF

Chapter 7: Slipping Deeper....

I could tell by her body language and hushed voice that I hurt her feelings, and it made my chest hurt. I didn't care who was looking, I needed to make things right. I got up quickly and strode over to her, my thumb and index finger hooked under her chin to make her look at me. She looked up at me and her eyes were glistening, like she was about to cry but was fighting it.

I let out a sigh and mentally kicked myself for being such an ass. My thumb gripped her chin a little harder and it made her mouth part ever so slightly, which must have made my lips do the same because she went from looking me in the eyes to looking at my lips. My other hand reached up and gripped her waist possessively and I drew her to me, close enough that I could feel the swell of her breasts against my hard chest, my lips inches from hers, and I could feel every intake and exhale of breath.

"I'm sorry for shouting at you, Y/N," I said quietly, my hand moving to cup the side of her face, my long fingers moving under her ear to cradle her head. She instinctively leaned into my touch as her head turned slightly, her parted lips seeking the pad of my thumb, and when her bottom lip brushed against it I felt a breath hitch in my chest. The feeling was electric, and I could feel a tingling sensation.....everywhere. It took everything in my fucking power not to devour her right there. "I know you want this song to be more upbeat and faster, I just wanted to show you how a slower melody can evoke the same passion you want to show. The kind of passion I am talking about is deeper, emotionally jarring, and sensual beyond measure. It is about a deep longing for the one you love after finally finding what you feel you have always been searching for," I said, looking into her eyes.

I could feel her breath on my thumb, as her lips rested just centimeters from it. "And you've felt this passion before, Yoongi?", she asked.

I hesitated before answering, realizing that if I shared this with her, it meant that I was revealing something I wanted to keep hidden, probably forever. I dropped my hands from her face and her waist, and took a small step back, shoving my hands in my pocket. I looked at the floor when I answered, carefully choosing my words.

"Yes.... I did feel that passion for someone once. It was for someone..... that I felt I loved for a long time but who I felt I would never be able to have. One day my dream came true, and she was mine. I fell for her and I fell for her hard. My passion for her was shown in many ways as you mentioned, romantically, emotionally.....sexually. The feelings I expressed in the notes I wrote her I wrote for no one else, before or since. Each one was like a time capsule of emotion that I bottled up just for her. When I heard you sing the song you wrote, I could feel that same kind of passion – drawn out like a love letter, baring their soul to the reader.

Y/N was quiet as she took in all I had said to her. I stood uncomfortably wondering if I had made a mistake with sharing this information with her, when I heard her speak.

"How long did you have these feelings for her before you two became a couple, Yoongi," she asked, her question almost a whisper.

My heart hurt. I didn't like these questions. I can't avoid answering now though - I had to make her understand. "Years, Y/N. I couldn't shake it. I couldn't do anything about it though because I was just this dorky kid and she was one of the popular girls."

"And when you two finally became a couple....how long until....," she asked, leaving the question open ended even though I knew exactly what she was getting at.

"Not long. She didn't love me like I loved her, she used me and dumped me in front of the whole fucking school. I know I was young, but I really loved her, I had never felt those feelings for anyone before," I said, rushing through the explanation to get it over with quickly. I wanted to add that I have had an inkling of that feeling once more since then...but I didn't want to scare her. I still wasn't sure of the extent of my feelings, and I knew now wasn't the time to explore them.