The Rude, Blunt Kid|He loves me, Not

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C h a p t e r  F o u r t e e n

(Star)

"He loves me," I pluck a petal from the  pink flower I picked up on my way home. I pluck another one. "He loves me not."

I heave a sigh, and reluctantly pluck another petal. There were four remaining and I didn't want to think hard about what I'd get. This is just a playful game yet it seems like it holds my fate. "He loves me."

"He loves me not," another disappointment through the drain. I glanced at the two remaining flowers and pluck them without haste. I let the stem fall from my hands and let out a groan that I knew wasn't pleasant. "He loves me not."

I lay across my room, staring at the mint green ceiling with my thoughts rushing all at once. I reach out for my hand and clench it. "Why must liking someone be so complicated?"

"I wish this would go away just like a cold," sometimes I'd convince myself it's just the hormones but I knew that wasn't the case.

"Why must he be so patient, kind and caring to me, yet I always do the opposite," I say in a  thought. "--of all the people why must it be him?"

"He's a loser, but he makes me heart beat so fast," I close my eyes and try to feel the rhythm of my heart beating. "--if only he knew how much he makes me feel this way."

///

Flashback :

Crushes are stupid. Or so what my younger self convinced me. Everyone would shyly give a flower to the girl they like, secretly hold hands and smile while they enjoy the company one gives.

I didn't think that way. It was way too young to like someone. It's just mere hormones playing along, kids will always be kids. There are no guarantee that what they feel today would be the same tomorrow.

"You're stupid, Melia," I say aloud to her when she got back from talking to her 'boyfriend', if you can ever call it that way. She darts a teasing smile at me. "Star, Star. You don't understand. If you feel what I do, then you would understand."

"I don't need feelings to know," I replied, rocking my feet back and forth. "You're stupid and that won't change. Crushes are just small things, yet you make it seem like a big deal."

"You're mean as usual," Melia pulls her tongue out to taunt me. "Too bad no one likes you since you're so mean and harsh. Be more friendly, I'm sure someone out there will love you for who you are."

I raised a brow. "Love? Isn't that such a big word. Melia, only adults feel love. What we feel or how YOU feel is nothing compared to love. So don't go muttering nonsense."

"Sometimes I forget you're still ten," she chimes and rocks her feet back and forth. "You sound like a mother."

"That's because I'm way ahead of you guys," I mutter under my breath. "So how did you and Kevin, like you know, turned out like this?"

"Ooh.. are you interested now?" she giggles and I restrain myself from rolling my eyes. "He sent me a letter. Told me he liked me and wanted to you know, try out this thing," she fiddles with her hair.

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