Wildflower (Kris Bryant)

33 Postive Mind Positive Life

Kris

It was kinda crazy how fast everything fell together. One night we were just looking at houses, the next one we bought a house and now we're moving in.

It's well into September and the baseball season is starting to wind down. I've been in Chicago for over five months now and it's been such a incredible experience. Besides those dark 18 days I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. It was always my dream to be in the MLB, but never did I think it would be this incredible. Like my life was this totally predictable movie where everyone ends up living happily ever after.

But no matter how many times I pinched myself I still felt like I was dreaming. This house we got was amazing, like something out of a magazine. And it was ours, every last bit of it. Beatrice loved the backyard and Serenity had her nook for the long nights she feels like she can't fall asleep. And I had the one thing I never thought I would have, and that's absolutely nothing to complain about.

"Okay, everything is out of the apartment and into the house. Now comes the fun part" Serenity announces as she closes the door to our old apartment behind us. She locks it and so closes another chapter in my life.

She turns to me with this mischievous look on her face and I just hope that's not her "we're going shopping" face. "And what's that" I wonder carefully.

"Decorating" she cheers and I smile.

"Please don't day Target run" I beg.

"Target run" she yells she she throws her arms above her head and I let out a long groan.

Goodbye to my next 6 hours of freedom.

We get to Target and I follow Serenity around for I don't know anything about designing a house. I swear she was just throwing things in the cart without a idea as to what she wanted to do with this stuff. She's so creative that she could pick up anything and make it look good regardless of what goes in the cart. So I let her beautiful imagination run wild and try my best to give my opinion even though I haven't a clue as to what I was talking about.

"So we're going to go with a yellow and navy blue and grey theme I see" I say as I pick up a couch pillow she tossed in the cart.

"Yup. The navy and grey has calming effects on us even if we don't see it. But they're smooth and flexible colors that will pull everything together. Plus with most of the appliances and furniture in the house being a grey it just makes sense to continue on with it. But the yellow is my favorite. It gives off a vibrant feeling and expresses happiness even when things might seem dark" she claims.

I turn to her as she looks for little things to put up around the house and just smile. "What is it like to be happy all the time" I wonder and she giggles.

"I'm not always happy. But being around you... well I have no reason at all to be sad" she claims.

"That's cute. But I never heard you say anything negative in my life besides that day on the front porch" I accuse.

She stops messing with a light and turns to me as she shifts in her spot. She wouldn't look at me and it made me sad to see her all of the sudden shut down like that. "It wasn't always like that. There was a time in my life where all I had was negative thoughts. Why wasn't I pretty enough? Why wasn't I smart enough? Why wasn't I cool enough?

Why wasn't I enough?

But I realized that a negative mind gives you a negative life. I can't ask those questions and ever expect to be happy. Comparing myself to everyone around me made me sick. It gave me anxiety and I couldn't sleep or eat. It was just really unhealthy for me to be so stuck in my head and be so mean to myself.

So I started asking myself different questions. What makes me happy? What does my over bearing but loving family mean to me? Why did god give me a defective heart and let me live this long if it wasn't for a purpose? And hell, I might never know why out of all the trouble I went through and all the luck I got I got to stay. But I know that I can't take this life for granted. I have my second chance and I'm not going to spend it wondering what might have been if I did something different. I can't worry about that. All I'll ever have is here and now, that's why it's called the present. Because it's a gift and no one likes rotten gifts" she smiles.

"I guess not. But no one I know sees the world in the way you do. Like it's the most beautiful thing you've ever seen even though it's been pretty ugly recently" I explain.

"It has been. But in a world so dark and so dead I look for that bright yellow wildflower still growing through the adversity. Still defeating the odds. I look at it and smile because it grows when no one thought it could and it doesn't let the darkness make it any dimmer. It just shines brighter and brighter to remind people that it's not our dark surroundings that make us who we are. It's what we make of it" she claims.

"See... it's when you say stuff like that that makes it all the more impossible to have to leave you" I accuse.

She laughs at me as she tosses a few more things to put in the cart. "Remember that when we get to the checkout line" she jokes. I'll try my best.

Eventually we do checkout and after she assures me this was all in budget we get to the house. I didn't have time to help her set up because I had a game so I reluctantly say goodbye to her. She gives me a kiss before I head of to Wrigley to do my part in helping with the playoff push.

We end up winning and I was in a really good mood after the game. So I do my interviews and take a shower before coming home. It was nice to pull into the garage and know that I was home sweet home.

I let myself inside and I almost didn't recognize the place. It looked like we were on one of those house flipping shows. Or extreme makeover home edition.

I set my keys on the new key holder and toss my bag to the side. I slip my shoes off before going in search for my girlfriend.

But I knew where she would be, the same place that is the reason that we just had to have this house. I join her in the book nook and she looks up from the book she was reading. This place was already packed wall to wall with books I'm sure she'll read them 100 times each in her time here.

"You got a nice set up here" I tease.

She tucks a stray curl behind her ear as she looks up at me. "I think it's pretty great. There's still a few things I want to do, but I think for the most part this is our home" she smiles.

"I love it" I promise.

"And I love you" she assures me.