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29

Luna plopped into the seat next to me in sixth period—Government. "Where were you at lunch?"

"Avoiding people." And looking for Joey. Since the initial sighting that morning, I hadn't been able to find him again. Was this how he was going to play it? We were just supposed to go back to normal, like we didn't know each other at all?

"You look tired."

"I am. I should've stayed home."

"You should just wear a sign for the next week that says 'Touch me and I'll put an ugly pic of you in the yearbook.'"

I smiled. "Think that'll work?"

"That's the ultimate threat, Addison. Use your power."

I pulled my binder and a pen out of my backpack because Mrs. Harris started writing on the whiteboard. "I want to go to the hospital today after school and talk to Jacob's parents. Take them flowers or something."

"Do you know his parents?"

"I met them at his pool party last summer. I feel like I need to do something."

"Me too. I'll come with you."

"Thank you." I was hoping she'd say that. I still wasn't sure what I would say to his parents. You probably don't remember me but I should've been in that car with your son? Sorry I wasn't with him when he plummeted forty feet into a river? Those would make great icebreakers.

"They'll probably be happy to see some of his friends."

"They'll tell us how he is, right?" I asked.

"I hope so."

Mrs. Harris clapped her hands twice. "Okay, class, get to work on these questions, then we'll discuss."

"These flowers feel too cheery, too bright," I said, unable to get out of the car even though Luna had turned off the engine two minutes ago and the car was slowly transitioning to cold.

"I think that's the point. We're not going to a funeral, Addison."I groaned. "I know." My palms were sweating. I took several deep breaths. He was fine. Jacob was fine. I pulled on the door handle and pushed open the door. "Let's go."

The lady at the information desk pointed the way to the intensive care unit waiting room, warning us that's as far as we'd make it if we weren't family. I was okay with that.

Luna grabbed my hand as we turned the last corner.

I recognized Jacob's parents immediately from the summer before—both tall and handsome, like Jacob. They sat in the corner of the room, a few others I didn't recognize around them. It seemed as though their bodies and the chairs they sat in had become one, like they'd been there for years. A television was on in the corner but nobody was watching it. My chest tightened another notch.

"We shouldn't be here. I feel like I'm intruding," I whispered. "You think they'll be mad at me that I'm fine and he's . . . ?"

Luna pulled on my arm, forcing me to face her. "You've done nothing wrong. I think they'll be happy that you care about Jacob and you're here to check on him. You're breaking up the monotony of their day."

"You're right."

"Of course I'm right." She walked forward, pulling me with her.

Jacob's mom barely glanced at Luna before meeting my eyes. The stem of one of the daisies in my hand snapped. I loosened my hold.

She stood, her hands going to her mouth. Jacob's dad looked at her and then followed her gaze to me. He offered a shaky smile. Then Jacob's mom was weaving past chairs and people until she stood in front of me. I felt seconds away from passing out even though I had only ever passed out the one time.

I held out the flowers lamely, unable to speak. Luma saved me.

"Mrs. Matson, we are so sorry about Jacob and just wanted to come and say that we were thinking about him."

Even though Luna had been the one talking, Mrs. Matson's hazel eyes hadn't left mine and they crinkled with a smile. "Addison," she said.

So she did remember me. "Yes, hi."

She gripped me by my shoulders, the flowers still held out between us. "Addison."

This was getting weird. I nodded.

"I'm so happy you're here. Jacob thinks the world of you."

"He does?" I'd always hoped he was talking about me to someone. I never imagined it was his mom.

She pulled me into a hug, her chin digging into my forehead. The flowers, which I'd only slightly destroyed before, were now crushed. When she let go, still not acknowledging Luna, she began dragging me toward the waiting group. I helplessly followed, giving Luna a look that said, please don't abandon me. She read it well and stayed close on my heels.

"Jason," Mrs. Matson said when we reached her husband. "This is Addison."

A barely-there smile appeared on his face. "Yes, I remember you from a party at our house, nice to see you."

I held out the now limp flowers, hoping someone would take them from me. He did.

"Thank you."

"Addison wants to see Jacob," Mrs. Matson said out loud.

"Oh. No, that's okay, I know it's family only. I just wanted to find out how he was doing."

"Yes, it's family only, cousin Addison," Mrs. Matson said, giving me a wink.

"What?" I don't know why I said that. I got her implication immediately. I was just shocked. Why would she want me to see Jacob?

My own question was answered minutes later, after Luna had given me a shrug, after Mr. Matson had gone along with the lie, his dark eyebrows only rising slightly in surprise, after I'd made it past the nurse with the cousin story despite my sweaty palms. Mrs. Matson linked her elbow with mine conspiratorially as we followed the nurse down a long white corridor. She whispered, "These first few days are very important for Jacob. They've put him in a medically induced coma until some of the swelling in his brain has gone down. Maybe his girlfriend is just the medicine he needs."

"No . . . I mean we're not . . . we never even . . . we're not together."

"I know, but it was only a matter of time, right?"

I swallowed hard. Yes, it was only a matter of time. I liked him. So I could forget about the pressure I felt right now to be what his mom needed me to be—some sort of miracle worker. I could try to shake off the jitters I always felt about seeing someone sick and helpless. Right now he needed me. We stopped outside a door and the nurse pushed it open. His mom smiled my way, and we all stepped inside.