The "Secretism" Disease

No LOVER Included

Braxton barely woke up to the sound of his alarm clock, screaming and begging for him to wake up.  He rubbed his eye lids and stretched his arms, trying to be a little more awake but he just couldn't be.  He was so tired.  He had staid up all night, studying for his English test that was later today.  Studying and studying and even studying a little more after that, for the big test coming up.  Now, the information was basically carved into his head.

He lazily slid from his bed to the floor, wanting to just go back to his bed and fall asleep for about another three hours, but he knew that he couldn't.  After all, why would he do all of that studying, just to be late for the test?  He drowsily walked to his kitchen.  It looked like he had to pour his own cup of coffee today.  He wished his mother wasn't asleep at that moment so she could do it, since he was drowsy and might be clumsy, but he knew that if he had even dared to wake her up, that she'd get angry and he hated when his mother got angry, because of her bipolar disorder.  It would make her physically abusive and he would be terrified to even approach her, considering that she could be extremely violent in one minute, and be relaxed in the next.

Anyway, he poured coffee into a brown mug that had an adorable, white elephant on it that looked hand-drawn.  His mother had purchased it from his aunt, Jaquelyn, while playing "Secret Santa" the Christmas before.  He added a little bit of vanilla liquid creamer and mixed it with caramel liquid creamer with it, his favorite concoction ever since he was allowed to drink coffee at all.  He grabbed a tea spoon from a drawer in front of him and stirred the sweetened coffee in a circular motion before quickly drinking it.  

Since he was still wearing only his underwear and socks, he decided to get himself dressed.  He went back to his bedroom and picked out a pear of black "Adidas" sweatpants and a random yellow T-shirt and baggy blue hoodie.  He brushed his teeth with his mint toothpaste that felt slightly cold on his teeth, that had just stayed hidden in his warm mouth for the three hours that he slept.  As he brushed his teeth, he started remember his dream, which he soon found out, was a very terrifying nightmare.  He remembered being tightly held in a hospital bed; strapped to it, actually.  And there were people that were wearing masks, who were poking sharp tools at him and were stabbing syringes filled with crazy-looking liquids of various colors into his body.  Luckily, it was only a nightmare so he felt nothing, but it looked and sounded so real to him at the time.

He was finally done brushing his teeth, and he decided that he should probably pack his backpack.  He put his English notebook, folder, and legal pad into his backpack, as well as his stress ball, his spell book, and his small, black case of mechanical pencils.  He zipped his back closed and opened the front door to his house as he waited for the local school bus to come and take him and the rest of his schoolmates to school.  Finally, after about six minutes of waiting for it to come, it finally came and stopped right by his bus stop, the smell of gas lingering toward him as if it were greeting him. Its door opened with a loud, annoying squeaky noise.  

He climbed the bus's stairs to only find that there were barely any seats that were free. ("Free" meaning that they had two instead of three people in them, and if they did, the people were very small, so he would be able to sit there).  He sat in seat "10" by a couple that were being clingy as hell and wondered why popular jerks were getting partners in a blink of an eye, and sweet outcasts like him weren't getting anyone anytime soon.  The couple shared a very passionate kiss, which made him depressed, because even at the age of fifteen, he had never kissed any girl except his grandma and mother.  She began to kiss and suck on his neck, leaving more hickeys than he had before, and he had a lot of them.  He sighed and thought: 'that's something I would no be ready for!  Not at all...' 

Finally, the bus stopped at his posh-looking school, McCayle Academy.  The school was large and there were many children and young adults going there and many new students were eager to soon attend.  Anyway, he waited for all of the children, young adults, and the very, very small children.  He finally walked off of the bus, jumping off of it at the end of the ride.  And like everyday and every other day, he felt invisible.  Not like how most people felt, like they're invisible in a casual day, but if they tap on somebody's shoulder, they'll respond.  He felt so invisible that he knew that no student would be think about him, talk about him or dare to even either of the two.  That is why he knew to keep his mouth shut unless a teacher called on him and as for the rest of the time, stay out of the way.

He walked to the grass and to the concrete path that was before the school's entrance.  He tried to open the doors but a tall, dark guy had already opened them for him, which he assumed was for him, so he walked halfway through the doors as a beautiful, tall blond girl walked through the doors before him.  

Smack!   Was the sound he heard after the door hit him, right in the middle of his forehead.  The people continued to walk into the school as the people walked on, the guy put his arm around the girl, saying sweet little nothings that made her giggle as they ignored what the hell had just happened.  He knew they were a couple.  A couple with love.  And no matter what kind of love they had, he knew that it was something that he knew that he would never ever have for himself.

To Be Continued...