Sunday Night Lights

Chapter Six | Unexpected

Bulimia had taken a toll on Allyson before I met her. More than I think she even understood, and I'd never want her to turn back to that. I'd been dealing with my own emotions recently, but that didn't mean I'd forgotten about hers, too. I still loved her and only wanted the best for her. She was part of my future, too, probably even more so than football because she was my future wife and the mother of my children.

She turned to look at me when I stopped at the bottom of the steps. Her eyes focused in on me which made my next task a little more daunting. I told her I didn't need help, so I better not let my words come back to bite me. A sharp breath escaped my lips.

Come on, Daxson. You've got this. Just four steps.

I placed the crutches on the first step and leaned forward, using my entire body weight to jump onto the first step.

One down. Three more to go. I've got this.

I repeated my previous motion and hopped up onto the second step, but by this time, my armpits were aching from the pressure of the crutches. I took a few deep breaths before getting in position to conquer the next step. As I started to jump to the third step, my right foot caught the concrete which sent an aching pain racing through my entire leg. I stumbled and crashed to the steps, catching myself with my hand as the crutches clattered to the ground, sliding all the way down to the bottom step.

"Dax!" Allyson called, dropping the bags by the door and hurrying to me. "Are you okay?"

I managed a stiff nod. "I'm fine."

Shifting my weight to alleviate the pain, I readjusted my leg and leaned my head back to stare up at the sky. The anger pulsed through me like rushing water from an opened the dam. My head spun because all I wanted to do was rip God limb from limb, to make him hurt like I had for all these years. If he was really there all the time, what the hell was he doing? It was almost like my life was a game for him to watch. It hurt to know that my father loved God so much yet He had done nothing for him. He raised me to trust in Him and to believe in His plan, but with each year that passed, it became more difficult to do.

"Just a little set back." I sighed and tilted my head to finally look at Allyson, trying to hide the frustration in my eyes.

She had silently gathered my crutches and placed them behind us before taking a seat beside me. "You're so hard-headed," she whispered, leaning her head into her hands.

"What do you mean?" I couldn't help but stare into her eyes that always reminded me of small tidal pools.

She rolled her eyes as if unamused by my question. "You know exactly what I mean."

I continued to study her face, taking in the dark circles that made their home beneath her eyes.

"You're refusing to let me help you. I mean, I understand you want to do it on your own. I totally get it. I felt that way when I had to overcome my bulimia, but it really makes everything better if you accept help." Her small hand touched my arm. "Please let me help you like you helped me, Dax."

I forced out a hard breath and pulled my arm from beneath her hand. The conversation had become serious so easily.

"Ally, this is a different situation. This truly is something that I'm going to have to get through on my own. That doesn't mean I don't love you... I just know what it's going to take," I pleaded with her to understand.

"I thought we were a team," She whispered, pulling her knees to her chest and staring out into the front yard.

"We're a team. A pretty damn good one." I followed her eyes out into the yard before looking back at her with a tight-lipped smile. "We're like... We're like Misty-May and Keri Walsh."