A Fiery Love ~ Dramione (Sequel to Stay By My Side)

36. The First Night

Here's a bit of an early update guys! It's currently 12.15am where I am so I'm not sure how early or how late it is for you guys, but hopefully it's a nice surprise no matter what time is for you!
Also I just made a new cover for this book which I changed. It's been a while since I made anything like that so I hope it looks decent! Anyways, enjoy!

Hermione

For a couple of long hours, time stayed still.

I couldn't fathom the shock of today's events. I stayed in my apartment just thinking and waiting. Thinking about my regret for keeping Draco in the dark, and about everything we said to each other before he left. His harsh words weighed heavy on my mind, but I knew I needed to hear them. He was right. I was selfish. I had no right to lie to and deceive him, I now regret not telling him about Blaise as soon as problems started to arise. I really, genuinely thought I was doing the right thing in trying to protect him from the truth. I love him enough to try to prevent him from doing anything that pushes him over the edge, I thought I was protecting him...but now I realize, as more problems started to occur, that the only person I was protecting was myself. Because deep down I was ashamed.  I was an idiot, and this is my punishment. Being left alone with my own thoughts, and Draco, gone from my side.

Hours earlier Draco left my home, and it was like he took a piece of me with him. I truly wondered if he'd ever come back. He was so angry, and I can't say I blame him. This was a mess that I created, and it tore me apart. I missed him terribly and I so badly wanted him to come back so we could talk things through. I wanted him to see how immensely sorry I really was, I needed him to forgive me. In the meantime I had myself locked in my apartment with the tears flowing endlessly. 

I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror. I looked so pathetic. I was still wearing my dress from the horrible engagement party hours prior, which now wasn't so pretty  looking to me anymore. My hair was an unkempt, matted mess. Ginny did a skillful job at my make-up earlier, but it was now ruined as a result of my crying. I was red faced, and just a general mess. But I felt a lot worse than I looked.  I felt as though my heart was torn in two and trampled on. Draco's face was etched in my mind, my deep remorse and shame was too much to bear.

I sniffed as I made my way into the living room to take the weight off my feet. I've been pacing around my apartment for hours since  Draco left. Waiting, hoping. I longed to hear the sounds of my door knocking and to open it to see Draco. But of course, nothing like that happened. Deep down, I knew he wouldn't come back. When Draco says he won't be seen, he means it, like everything he says. He told me our break might be days or weeks, I couldn't bear the thought of either. It was too long, I must see him soon. I needed to find a way to contact him, wherever he is. I needed to assure him how much I love him and how much I regret my wrongdoings. I was willing to do anything to make everything better. My shame is one thing, but the hurt I caused Draco was a more important thing for me to acknowledge. I was an idiot, well and truly. 

I laid down on my back and I just stared numbly at the ceiling. Time stayed still around me. Many words that were exchanged earlier played in my mind over and over like a broken record. There was one thing that bothered me the most, something that Draco left me hanging on.

He has a son?

Those were pretty much the last words he told me before he stormed out of my apartment. A son with Sarah Harrison? I was deeply confused and I wasn't sure how to feel or what to think. Maybe he was lying to hurt me? No, that just sounds too silly. Why would Draco lie about having a child? Maybe Sarah lied? I knew she was devious, so it was probably  a possibility. I wanted answers regarding this so bad, but it was difficult to attempt to come to a logical conclusion with such little information or facts. The thought of Draco having a son admittedly hurt me because I always imagined that our first child would be with each other. If this child does exist, and if Draco forgives me, the idea of Sarah Harrison weighing a heavy presence in our lives is something I don't anticipate.