40 | panic

15 5 2
                                    

I hear my heartbeat in my chestall my breathing is okay,

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I hear my heartbeat in my chest
all my breathing is okay,

suddenly someone says something
and I'm overthinking things
finding hidden meanings and depictions -
what the fuck do I do?

they say when your mind is overheating,
you should take a break
but what they don't know is that
it's running with me all the damn time

if I don't do something and take a break
do nothing and just think,
I'm just thinking and thinking
watching seconds of my life drop by

if I try to do something else, distract my mind
right now, then I'll
probably just confuse myself
and stop to recollect my thoughts

and that's when you go down
it's like pouring down your thoughts
trying to sieve through them
but only big lumps come back out

even though you sieved them
and crushed them so they're fine
turns out you forgot a large chunk
so you've got to back and think

it's a never ending process
it goes round and round and round
until I just get dizzy, call it quits,
and try to sleep it off

when it'll come into my dreams
plaguing my every thought
I don't know what I'm going do
because it's all just one big panic

caring all too much I guess,
it's nice and all in hindsight,
but in actuality it's like
just like walking into a room
except you've forgotten what it was for
so you just find your way back out

but I guess you don't forget
when you overthink
you just overlook the fine details
and now I'm crying out.

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