Honey and spice

𝐶ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑟 7

I wish I could say that the rest of my weekend was as spontaneous as the last two days have been. That, however, was not true.  It went about as slow and boring as usual, except now do I realise how boring my life had been up to this point. Nothing ever happened...maybe I liked being spontaneous far more than I would like to admit. 

It was exhilarating.

 But now it's time to get back to my life, the way it had been up to this point. 

So I go back to school as usual, get my books from my locker as usual and go to my morning AP English class. Usually, I liked English but today was different for some reason. Why?

"Earth to Brooke." 

I look up at Callie with a confused expression. Suddenly the room seems to be empty and the teacher has left. Even Callie isn't in her usual seat next to me, instead she's waving a hand in front of my face. 

"Huh?" I blurt out. 

"Um...class is over. You've been sitting there staring at the board for the whole class and didn't move a muscle until now, when literally everyone left. Are you ok or do I need to take you to the school nurse?" 

Honestly...I don't know if I'm ok. I zoned out completely, I don't even have a clue what happened in the last hour. I was just gone. 

"Um no I'm fine," I say and move my sluggish body from my seat. 

"You don't seem fine...are they back? Have you been taking your medication?" Callie pressures. 

She's talking about my psychotic episodes. I used to get them a lot when I was younger, doctors believed it was due to schizophrenia however I wasn't officially diagnosed for some reason, at least to my knowledge. I guess my parents didn't want to admit their perfect little daughter could have such a life-affecting condition. It would ruin their image.  I was prescribed medication and it pretty much went away with time, although sometimes I get minor relapses. However, it can be blamed on stress and lack of sleep I guess. So maybe I don't have schizophrenia after all and it was some phantom disorder. Nonetheless, I told Callie this a few weeks ago in case it happened again and she didn't know what was going on. She was really understanding and I'm very grateful for that...except now she keeps bringing it up when I'd rather forget about it. 

"I haven't been on medication Callie, my parents say I don't need it. I haven't taken medication for a few years now," I tell her. 

"Have you been to a doctor to get that checked out?" She asks. 

"No," I admit. 

My parents are control freaks, I only go to the doctor when I'm really sick. And by really sick I mean in serious need of medical attention. I've only been to the doctors twice since I've stopped taking my medication four years ago. Apparently they don't believe in modern medicine anymore. 

"I don't like what they're doing to you, it's cruel!" She snaps and links my arm with hers to lead me into the hallway. 

"What do you me?" I ask. 

"They don't let you make your own choices, they won't even let you go to the doctor! They control every aspect of your life and put so much pressure on you which is unrealistic because you're only human."

She's right, they do have unrealistic expectations. But it's not like I can do anything about it. I'm just me...and it's their house, I have to follow their rules. It's just how it is. 

"Yeah, they do have rather high expectations." 

"B...this isn't normal. It's like they brainwashed you or something, you have to stand up for yourself."