Life goes on

Chapter ten: alone.

     I waited for about an hour until I heard the door open. Was it finally Renea and my mom getting back? I wasn't sure but I hope it was, I want to know what my mom was so desperate to talk to Renea about. I heard footsteps come up to my room and I saw Renea the next second. 
     "hey girl it seems like forever I've been dying to talk to you." I saw sitting up on my bed looking at Renea in the doorway.
     "yeah your mom just wanted to talk for a little bit I'll explain later but let's catch up"
      "y'all were gone for a A while just to seem like a little bit for you but okay"
     "yeah sorry that we just left here without any explanation but she just wanted to go"
     "That's weird but since you wanted to talk and catch up let's do that really quick.... Treehouse?"
     "yeah that's fine." Renea says in a less exited tone.
     I was really eager to find out what Renee and my mom had talked about for all that time because they were gone for a long time. I did a question it but I was just glad that she was back and safe. We climb to get my tree house and sat down and began to talk about school and such stuff like that. We've never had such a boring conversation before and I just wanna know what was up. I decided to be straight forward with her.
     "why did you let my mom talk about, its really bothering me" I spat out that sentence faster than I can process what I was saying.
     "well if you must know we were talking about your well-being and how everything is just been going down with Noah. You may not realize it but she's really worried about you Nazery."
     "I'm calling BS on that. She doesn't even care." I said in an frustrated tone. She doesn't even care about me. Now that I think of it, no one does. What's the point or having friends and a boyfriend if they don't even care about each other. That's right, there isn't one. And if there is I haven't found it. "Neither do you Renea. You have no idea what's going on or what could be racing through my mind. I'm sorry if this comes off rude but I just want to be alone for now and until further notice."
     "I'm sorry if it seemed like I never cared but I understand." Renea said in a sad tone while her voice started to crack towards the end.
     She walked out and I'm was left alone with all of my thoughts. Why did I just do that? Should I say sorry? What am I going to tell Noah? What about everyone else? Then it hit me. What about homecoming. A week away and I'm not even sure if I have a date never the less want to go. Everything and every one has just been so uptight and mean lately. Okay maybe not mean but sometimes it feels like the whole world is against me. I need to stop thinking about myself and fine a distraction. I thought to myself for a while. What could possibly get my mind off of things. I started to think about my friend group and how I really have messed things up. Wait, I haven't. Jessica has. I started thinking about how Kate was finally happy with Kaden and how me and Noah are so broken right now. Then my mind shifter over to Renea and Adrian. My stomach felt butterflies when I thought about Adrian. What? Why? I don't know. I haven't felt this feeling since I met him a long time ago. I was never going to do something to get with him since he dated Renea and that's a sacred girl code law that you can't date your besties ex. But she wasn't my bestie at the moment. Plus I felt like he was the only person o could talk to and feel safe around knowing that I could trust him not telling anyone what we talk about. It has always been like this. I decided to text him.
     Me: hey Adrian.
     Adrian: Nazery it's not a good time, I'm not in a good place.. me and Renea just- I don't wanna talk about it.
     Me: meet me at our old park in 5.
     Adrian: Okay.
     Me and Adrian used to be best friends a long time ago. We never really told anybody but then again no body wanted to know or cares. We would always go to a park after school then get free ice cream and hang out. Even then I had the biggest crush on him. Elementary crush with the cutest guy of our grade since there was a little bit of kids in our school. Me and him would talk for what seemed like forever and we were so happy and content. We would play for what seemed like hours and have the funnest time of our lives. We stopped going there when we went into middle school and we got more distant as the years went on until he got with Renea. I've always been jealous of him being so happy with other girls when I felt like the perfect one was standing right in front of him. Me.
     I got to the park and I sat under our tree that we had shared so many stories under as kids. I was going through social media when I heard a voice "hey, Nazery." It was Adrian. He was finally here.
     "Hey yourself." I got up with a smile and hugged him. As we pulled away from the hug I noticed his eyes. Red and glossy. It looked like he had Ben crying his whole life. "Adrian wha-"
     "What happened to me? Why does it look like I've been crying since the pizza place?" He interrupted me. "Well to be honest, I've been worried about you and then Renea came to my house and told me everything and I started to cry. She said that none of us cared for you. And that no one did. She noticed me crying and jumped to the conclusion that I liked you and she yelled at me. It was horrible. I just care too much for my own good I guess. I think we're over but she never said it officially. Maybe she did. I don't know, it was hard to hear over her yelling." He started to tear up again. I placed my hand on his cheek and wiped his tear away with my thumb and then making his face look up towards me.
     "When I said all of those things I didn't mean them. Or at least, I didn't mean them towards you. I'm sorry Adrian I really am. And if she's going to treat such a kind hearted guy like that then she doesn't deserve you. And honestly I think it's over with me and Noah too. I have to talk to him tomorrow but I don't know anymore. I'm so stuck. I knew I could trust you so here we are."
     "Thank you Nazery." He said in a grateful tone. To be honest all I wanted to do was kiss him. The person I've had a crush on for forever now. Then I realized he was staring at my lips. I looked at his as he but his lower lip. I looked back up at him eyes. My hand was still on his cheek. He leaned in and i did as well. I stopped last minute as I felt his breath on my face. I put my forehead on his. "I don't know how to say this but I don't want to do this if it's just a rebound for the both of us. I have genuine feelings for you and I always have Adrian." I say with a cracked voice knowing that I could have just ended a start of something great.
     "I understand Nazery. Let's just talk about things for now." He said in a sad but understanding tone.
     "Okay" my voice cracked. He didn't tell me if he felt the same. How was I supposed to know? I let my hand off of his cheek and planted my back up against the tree trunk. It was quiet for a little while until I broke the silence. "Remember when we climbed this tree and I got stuck and you had to rescue me" I said as a little laugh escaped.
     "Oh yeah when you called me a hero for a week straight." He replied in the same tone laughing. I laid down looking at the leaves and the beautiful blue sky right above us.
     "I miss this. I miss us being so close like we once were. What happened?" I asked I'm a slightly dimmer tone. He laid down next to me looking at the sky as well. 
     "Well I think we both realized that we both had deep feelings for each other and we didn't want to go any further until we were a bit older." He said now facing me instead of the sky. He was right though.
     "Is that why you started to date Renea and all of those other girls, to forget the feelings that we had? Or store them in the back of your mind." I was still looking at the sky.
     "Yeah now that I think of it. Almost every night you would come across my mind at least once and I always got a little sad about it until I pushed it in the back of my mind." He said looking back at the sky.
     "Wow I didn't know the infamous Adrian would have such feelings for someone and be willing to be so open" I said in a sarcastic light tone.
     "I guess we both have our surprises huh." We both looked at each other and started to laugh.
     "Oh how I've missed laying here, with you. When you were falling asleep I would purposely stay up just to make sure you were okay. You always slept so peacefully and happily. I've never felt this way for someone and I never thought I'd be ready to." I said practically admitting my hidden love for him.
     "Really? I would do the same. I noticed you would look over at me but I waited til you laid back down. Such crazy kids we were." He said gazing over to the kids laying under a tree just like us over on the other side of the park.
     "Yeah really crazy"

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It took so long to write this. I like how Nazery and Adrian are confessing to each other. It's so cute. Hope you like it <3