Chapter 26

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Meta | メタ

This has got to be the worst day of my life so far.

Under my breath, still face down on the sofa, I start singing a backwards version of the blessing song that's always sung at school graduations around here. "May your road be full of potholes; may the wind be ever in your face; may the rain pour down upon your head; may a tornado run through all your fields..." Running out of lyrics to corrupt, I pause for a second, before adding some new ones of my own. "May all your bacon burn; may you never eat a cookie again; may you catch a bad cold the night before Christmas and have to spend the whole day alone in bed—"

I suddenly get slapped in the back of the head, making me bolt upright for the first time in hours. "Hey, what was that for?" I snap at Forest, rubbing my head where he hit it.

"For saying you were gonna smack Blossom's date with the flat side of a sword, even if you were careful not to let 'er 'ear. You almost talked 'er out of goin' at all, you and your grumpin'," Forest scolds, sitting down upright on the cushion next to me and starting to fool around with his hacky sack again. "She's allowed to 'ave 'er fun sometimes too, y'know. She might be older 'n us, but she's still young 'n all, too."

Sullen, I cross my gloves and sink back into the sofa, glaring out at the world in front of me. "Yeah, yeah, whatever."

Forest snorts. "Would you quit bein' so hormonal? You've always known she's never gonna return your silly little crush, so quit bein' so jealous of 'er finally getting to run around a bit like most people do when they're young. She's always so busy lookin' out for us; why can't she have some fun?"

"I'm not being 'hormonal!'" I snap, picking up a throw pillow and burying my face in it. "I've loved her ever since I've met her."

I can sense Forest's huge eye roll even if I can't see it. "Meta, you're fifteen."

"Yeah, so what? I still know how I feel, Forest," I mutter angrily back.

Forest sighs heavily and repeats, "You're fifteen, and she's at least a decade and a 'alf older 'n that. You're barely 'alf her age. If she liked you back, I'd be concerned on a number of levels."

"Well not now, obviously," I whine back. "But one day, I'll be a hundred and fifteen, and she'll be, like, a hundred and thirty-one, and then it won't matter. It won't matter a long, long time before that, even."

"And she's just supposed to put her life on hold for a crush she doesn't even know about that you're going to grow out of one of these days?" Forest questions in a voice so calm and collected that it makes me want to punch him.

Instead, I just throw the throw pillow at him and start pacing the room angrily. "Quit acting like you're so much older than me. You're only eighteen; you're just barely even an adult, yourself."

"Yeah, and I wouldn't expect someone Blossom's age to wait for me to grow up, either," he replies, still in the same calm tone of voice.

I give an angry groan. "Shut up, Forest. You don't get it."

He snickers a bit despite himself. "I don't think I've ever seen you looking this childish."

"I'm not being childish!" I shout back, crossing my gloves and stamping a foot once. Forest drops his hacky sack in his lap, cocks his head, and silently gives me an even look that clearly says 'Sure you're not.' Blushing a bit, I uncross my arms and just fall into a sitting position on the floor instead. "Fine. Maybe I'm being a bit childish. But at least I didn't say anything to Blossom."

Forest leans against the arm of the sofa and rests his face in one glove, watching me in an unimpressed manner. "Mets, we both know the real reason you didn't say anything is that you don't wanna be laughed at."

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