The Vibe Manager

Chapter 41

I opened and slammed the outer door to the corridor loudly to make them think I'd left, then crept back behind the entrance to Madre's office.

Jade was crying loudly, staring at the crumpled the paper in her hand.

"What did he write?" asked Madre gently, offering her a tissue.

Jade pulled herself together and, after blowing her nose, read from the paper: "I wish for whatever Jade wants most."

I knew her well enough to know that her mind was swimming in confusion. What she felt couldn't be explained, what could be explained fell short of what she was feeling.

We had failed in our match, and yet she'd gone a long way toward fulfilling herself. She thought she was about to lose her home again — and yet she was free. She had walked away from Rafael again — and yet she believed he had truly cared for her, after all.

That all of it together could pass so nearly for relief was the most confusing part of all.

She sat mutely surveying the paper lantern, the matches, Madre's phone resting on top of a file folder marked with a giant X.

On the tab she saw Rafael's name.

Before Madre could stop her, she pulled open the folder and smiled at the sight of his face.

The she wiped at the tears welling in her eyes again.

Rafael had already released himself from Nina's services? 

What else could she think? 

He would be a wonderful partner to the woman in Paris... From what he'd said, the two of them had reached the point where they were ready to join their lives, and now that he knew she was already married, there was nothing to stop them...

I watched her face as she imagined Rafael and the Parisian woman together in a slow-motion montage of café tables and walks along the Seine, paneled rooms with wrought iron balconies, zinc rooftops glowing in the silvery moonlight, and, in time, children toddling along gravel paths behind them... In himself, in his work and in his relationship with the Frenchwoman, Rafael had created a foundation for his life...

Jade closed the file.

Madre rose from her chair and came around the desk.

Jade stood, her face drained of all color, and put an arm around Madre's shoulders.

"Are you alright, Nina?"

"Yes, I will be. Are you?"

"I don't know. I don't know anything...."

Madre nodded and they sat down again.

"I think my son likes to act out all kinds of theatrical parts, but underneath those different roles is a hurt from our family drama that he and I both need to get past."

Jade nodded. "I told you, I've had some rough times myself, Nina. And in last couple of years, because of you and him, I had more pleasure than I would have thought possible.... but I was really like someone strolling through a store with model furniture displays... I liked the variety, and I couldn't imagine how anything could be set-up differently. But, of all the models I've seen and tested, what I really want is — something that feels impossible..."

"It isn't Jade. Not at all. Not for you and not for Bruno. I don't mean to suggest you should get back together. But when you and I first met, right here in this room, you had a very precise stipulation for a match. The person had to be successful in their own eyes. And without fully understanding it, I tried to fulfill it over and over, with many candidates."

"I know...you really tried."

"Taking into account everything that happened with my son just now, and looking at all of the matches you declined and the match you chose, what was the common denominator? Why did you choose each time as you did?

"I don't know.... Nina, I want to see Rafael again. Please — will you help me?"

Madre sighed.

"Yes, I will. I can help you." She held out her hands. "But think about it, Jade. What were you matching and not matching all that time? As bad as this seems, you still have more love for yourself than my son feels for himself. How could you stay matched for very long? In your choice of a partner, who needs to be successful in their own eyes?"