Black Cat's Diaries Series: 1888

IV: Black Cat: Main Estate

As I prepared myself for travel, I saw her in her study room writing on her Diary through the window that faced the screened porch. I hit the window hard. She startled and looked at me.

I knew that she can't see me but it made wonder what's going on through her head right now.

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June 1887:

North-East of England

[Blackrose Main Estate]

Dear: Diary,

My life as a Duke begins now. I am already 12 years-old.

I sometimes thought that this decision was a big mistake. My freedom is becoming limited.

Hopefully in the future I will get accustomed to this new pace of life. Pray for that Diary.

I am sitting on the leather sit in my study room, writing all my thoughts on you.

I heard gust of wind slammed on the window that faced the porch.

It frightened me, disrupting my thoughts.

Let me glance at the ocean for a minute, while I compose my thoughts.

I gazed at the window and I saw the ocean. Wales.

When Spring was over, we usually leave Wales for Scotland. Right Diary?

This time, I decided to permanently stay, here, at the Estate.

By the way I need to send letters to Scotland. To tell them that I plan on permanent staying in 'Wales'.

I know lying is bad Diary but we have no choice.

My jobs are mostly sign the papers and attend to my meetings.

I already learned Academics, music, and art, while living back and forth from Wales and Scotland.

Anyways, they will be useless later on. You already knew that, Diary.

Germany was mostly music and literature, thanks to Oma.

Although many or most expected a Duke to reside in a large manor with ten bedrooms or more, I preferred a residential homes with enough rooms for Adrian, Ariel and I.

I had a manor, it's in Cheshire and I don't want it.

I don't want to go back in there, but I guess, one of this days we have to make a pilgrimage to Cheshire.

When I was younger, I have never been in this part of England, even as a child when I accompanied Papa on his trips he never showed me this estate.

He probably thought that this job is troublesome and I was young then, so he never ever wanted to put this obligations on my shoulders. Never.

Why must everything be so complicated? I missed Wales and Scotland and even Germany. I missed the countryside and the quietness.

Although, I can see  the sea from where I sat, the feeling is not the same. Something about those places just makes me happy.

I had so many great memories from those countries, my heart and body just wouldn't let go.

For years and months, I only worked when I wanted to, not by a schedule which currently takes most of my free time and even my day.

This is my punishment for taking the title.

If I want the title, I must endure the burdens that comes with it.

I remembered that Papa once told me that long before I was born, my life was predetermine.

Their parents and my ancestors had planned everything accordingly, just in case if something were to happen.

Dukedom, Estates and Family Businesses.

Although, after a certain incident my three living grandparents had started to have different opinions. It was mostly my strict grandma who lived in Germany, not my carefree grandparents who is on the Far East, Grand-père and Baba.

"Abandon Blackrose and never stepped on the soil of England ever again", Oma once declared to me and I was forced to abide to that statement.

Diary, do you remember  when I was hid from the society for a very long time. Living in the society as Kyrie Alice Schäfer and not as Kharielle Artemis Blackrose.

The society thought that the Blackrose family was eliminate permanently from that event and wondered what will happened to the legacy.

Last year, I responded to the Queen's letter, the during my twelfth birthday, and I became the new Duke of Blackrose. Luckily, it wasn't made public at that time, or else Oma will go mad.

However, It will be this year, on my thirteenth birthday. Just pray that it wouldn't reach Germany and Oma.

Politics is not my forte. Business is my specialty.

I've studied for this for a very long time but to apply it to the real world is very complicated.

In the future, I have to sit in the House of Lords, but for now I am here.

My family history is very complicated and obscure, they're just too discreet.

Papa never told me about much about his family's history.

As far as I know, Papa's family are non-royalty but it surprised me that his family obtained a dukedom and owned various estates.

It made me wonder how long his ancestors worked to provide a better name and future for their descendants, such as I.

I feel like I don't deserve it because I didn't work for it. It was given.

I was given a better life than most people, and that's why I give some to the people who needed it the most.

It's been a long time since Papa and Mama were gone. I almost forgot how they looked like, but the only portrait I saved keeps my memory refreshed all the time.

Over the years, they become strangers to me, except on that certain day, that comes every year.

Every time that day comes, it always brings the nightmare.

The nightmare I buried deep inside the core of my skull.

My Pandora's box, which I never dared to be unlock.

I have to end here for today. I have few things I need to handle, but  I will have more time later.

P.S. I hope that all my sacrifices had significance. I don't want my life to end in tragedy, not after I fulfill all my wishes.

When everything is accomplished, fate can lead my life,

-Black Cat

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