Two tonned Carnation [7]

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Two tonned carnation.
“ I cannot be with you”

Her; [1]

Flowers, flowers, flowers.

You were obsessed with them and I loved it. You were doing what your heart desired  and I was more than a happy to watch you while you were trying to fix all small mistakes in already perfect bouquets.

You were my first friend, and the first person beside my granny and him who didn't judged me by my stupid hearing and speaking.

So many of them looked at me like some freak when they found I can't hear or speak, on the other side, they thought I was ignorant and that I was thinking so highly of myself because I don't want to speak to them.

I got beaten because of that. That's why I didn't visited everyday. You would be  worried if you knew how much that things affected me and you would be so mad at me for not saying anything to you.

I'm sorry.

But I can't help it. I'm not worth you. I'm not worth your soft skin and eyes full of galaxies. I'm not worth to be in your presence.

Sorry, I rejected you, but I couldn't even stand myself, I don't know how you can't stand me or why you stayed with me  for so long.  I'm sorry that I made you think you are in love, love doesn't exist.

For the first time I left you a flower, the same one you gave me, but two tonned, like my personality, and a message for you to get straight that I don't need a relationship. If I were to give it to you face to face i would broke, because I think I have that the same thing that doesn't exist for you too.

I'm sorry, I'm a coward.

16.2.2016

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