Sebastian was calling after you as you ran away, everything a blur.
You weren't sure where you were running- you just had to get away.
"(y/n)! stop!!" sebastian called out.
You knew he must be catching up but still him grabbing your arm caught you by surprise.
He turned you around to face him, not letting go.
His grip was tight, "Please talk to me."
Your eyes remained on the ground- you couldn't bare to meet his eyes.
Suddenly his other hand was tilting your chin up so that you were forced to meet his eyes.
They were filled with so much worry.
"What is going on?" he asked softly.
He cared so much...which was only making this harder.
"Everywhere I go on social media, I see hate towards me. Comments saying i'm not pretty enough, an attention whore, ugly, stupid. People telling me that you're too good for me, that i don't deserve to be in a relationship with you. People accusing me of using you for fame and money...." your voice was shaking as you spoke, and you could see anger rising in Sebastian's expression that he was calming for your sake.
His jaw was clenched now.
You gulped before continuing, "I tried to brush them away, I really did. But now i cant help but feel like they're slowly defining me. I cant stop thinking about them- they've weaved their way into my every thought. I look in the mirror and feel so unworthy, so full of lack....and then today, while you were signing things for those fans and taking pictures and being so sweet, one girl cake up to me and flat out accused me of using you. Criticized me for being a fan that you got interested in..."
"What the hell?!?" Sebastian spoke for the first time, "Who do they think they are?? That's unacceptable! You're gorgeous and amazing and if anyone's out of anyone's league, you're out of my league!"
"But I don't know if i can take this anymore, Sebastian," you said softly, looking to the ground yet again.
"No, no, no. Don't say those words. No, no, no," Sebastian said, putting his hands on your shoulders and looking at you.
Your watery eyes looked back up at him- his eyes were filled with fear.
"It's never going to stop, Sebastian...unless i do something..." you said quietly.
"No. please tell me you're not thinking what i think you're thinking," Sebastian's voice was trembling.
"I...i think we need to take a break," you said.
"No! No, i disagree!" seb argued, "We can fix this!"
"How?? The hate won't stop, Sebastian! i cant take it!" you exclaimed.
"Everyone will have haters in their life, you just have to learn how to shut them out. Be reasonable, (y/n)!" Sebastian's eyes were starting to grow watery.
"What if i cant shut them out?? what if i can never stop thinking about them?!"
"Well you have me! i'll be here! isn't that enough?"
"No, Seb, you won't be here. You're too busy traveling all the time for work..."
"Well i'm still a phone call away!"
"That's not the same!"
"So now you're blaming ME for having a job then? is that what this is all about?? breaking up with me because you don't see me enough??"
"No. I said i think we should take a BREAK!"
"That basically means break up! And i don't want that, (y/n). I care about you! isn't that enough?? you cant let these haters rule your life. they WANT us to give them what they want by breaking up! don't listen to them!"
"it's impossible! i cant get them out, seb, i cant get them out!" your tears were returning.
"how is breaking up with me going to solve any of that, (y/n)?" sebastian asked softly.
"I'm not saying it's the solution i just don't know what else to do..."
"Being alone won't solve anything.." he insisted.
"But I already am alone. Or at least I feel alone...you're always gone...and you're leaving again tomorrow..."
"it's my job, (y/n)!! i'm sorry, okay?! do you think i ENJOY leaving you all the time? I hate it! I just want to be near you all the time...but we can't always get what we want."
The wheels in your brain were turning, "You said breaking up wouldn't solve anything...but it would get rid of all the haters because i wouldn't be a nuisance to them anymore...i wouldn't have to be in the spotlight...."
"Stop. Stop that right now."
Tears were forming,
"Seb...i don't think this relationship is good for me mentally or emotionally...."
"It's not US it's the haters!! please don't do this!" sebastian's expression has now turned desperate.
You were crying, "Seb, I care about you and I always will, but I don't think i can handle this spotlight where people will always be judging me..."
"You just have to ignore them, (y/n)...please," his voice cracked, and he was on the verge of tears.
"I've tried...but it's pointless and it never works..."
"(y/n), no..."
"I think i need to take some time and work on my mental health, Sebastian....maybe someday we can get back together, i don't know, but for now..." your voice trailed off. "Don't say it."
"Goodbye, Sebastian."
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