Timeless [h.s]

Thirty one

"Eleanor and Oliver had expressed their desire many times; after no consideration at all, I took in their son and raised him as my own, even though he soon became old enough to be my father. The Grey and Cavendish family became more my own than the original Stuart household, and the rest is history. They kept their oath of protecting me through many generations, all because of Eleanor and baby Thomas. I've lived centuries and not even once their devotion faltered; if I am alive to this day, it's all because of them." I smiled a bit, knowing how many sacrifices those families made to keep me away from prying eyes, to guard my secret as if it was their own.

"I can't believe you've lived under the radar for all these years." Harry finally mumbled, looking at me as if he was seeing the real Charlotte for the first time. It was refreshing but also terrifying because what if he decided he didn't like what he saw? I was not ready to handle rejection, not yet.

"You'd be surprised how far people are willing to go if you give them some money. Also, fake documents are a bonus." He seemed taken aback by my blunt words but I was no longer refraining. I needed to tell him all about it, we still had too much ground to cover.

"You say that the Cavendish family has always had your back, that you and Oliver were friends, even childhood lovers. I was high on painkillers but I saw the way you looked at him in the hospital, Charlotte. You weren't surprised, dumbfounded, you were terrified. What happened, why would he make you feel like that?" I saw the annoyance in his eyes. Harry certainly didn't like Oliver, which was understandable from his point of view, but he asked a crucial question that would trigger many sensitive subjects. I needed to tell him about the death threats and the reason why he was in that hospital bed for starters. If he was inclined to leave, he surely would do so once I finished my tale.

"Do you remember our first date? The one you took me to your family's ice cream parlour?" I asked, ignoring his words for a bit. Harry seemed confused but nodded nevertheless.

"Yeah, you were weird but very nice." I smiled, thinking back to the awful sensation I felt the entire night after seeing him for the first time. I wanted him to be a real person as much as I was convinced he was just a dream, a fabrication of my subconscious mind as it tried to deal with grief and loss.

"Harry, I hope you understand that what I am about to tell you in no way interfered on my feelings for you. I liked you because of you, not because of what I am about to confess, okay? Please bear that in mind."

"You're freaking me out more, if possible." He mumbled, looking me in the eye expectantly.

"I wasn't just bothered because you shared the same name with the man I loved. You and him share much more. His name was Harry Styles and if you look yourself in the mirror and picture an armour, you'll have a pretty accurate image of what he looked like." I breathed out, seeing his eyes widen in horror.

"Are you telling me I am somewhat a fucking copy of the man you never got over?" he scoffed, eyes hardening and body distancing itself from mine.

"Harry, it's not like that. At first I was really bothered by the entire thing, that's why I didn't kiss you that night. You were just there, an exact copy of the one man I had ever deeply loved and I couldn't use you, I couldn't even look you in the eyes without seeing him. It wasn't fair, even though I really wanted to give in to my old fantasies and pretend you were someone else." Honesty was a two way street. He could appreciate the fact that I was being blunt about the truth but he also could blame me for lying and get even angrier. Judging by Harry's eyes, I'd say the anger was winning. I wanted to apologise and take back my words, but I knew I shouldn't, not when they were precisely how I felt back then. If we were supposed to move forward together, we'd have to find a way to leave the past behind, together.