SomeWhere On... (BXB)

...Deck 07

I was underdressed, but the food was fucking amazing. Murph was a confusing sack of shit, and we had an amazing time.

Well, I did. Murph looked ready to throw up after the appetizer.

The elevator takes us back down - him to deck seven and me to deck four. He's been quiet since we left, and I'm safely assuming that he's either thinking too hard, or if he opens his mouth he'll be sick.

"Wow," I sigh, patting my stomach. "That was good food."

Nothing.

"Like, your garlic pasta was good, but I think my steak was better."

Still nothing.

Now I'm pissed.

But I don't get time to be really pissed off because the doors open to deck seven. "I'll see you later, yeah?"

He doesn't get off. His hands are fists and he doesn't move.

"Murph?"

The doors close.

"Tommy, I want to talk about this with you. I'm going back in two days. I need to talk to you about this. Now. There, just, isn't another time for it."

I shiver. I'm pretty sure he used those words before.

The doors open for deck four, and people get on. I don't get off.

The elevator rises to deck six, and the people get off. We don't. The doors close, and the elevator just sits still.

"...what do you want to talk about?"

Murph sighs and ruffles his hair. "...I don't know."

I sigh this time. "What do you want to say?"

He looks at me, blue eyes glistening through his glasses. "I don't want..." His eyes drop and he takes my hand. "I don't want to go back to how things were."

The elevator begins moving. It's traveling up. "What do you mean?"

Murph sighs, breathless. "And I'm the one who lacks social awareness." He leans up towards me, and I'm frozen. Feet aren't moving. Brain's frying. And I'm still not sure what's going on.

His hand falls on my cheek, and I finally breathe like I'm not stone anymore. But my body is still stuck. I'm not in a corner. I'm not on a wall. I could push him off, or ask him what he's doing.

And I don't.

His lips are shaking when they meet mine, and he's holding his breath, too.

The doors open.

Murph backs away.

And I'm free from the spell of frozenness. I push the button for deck seven again and watch Murph in my peripheral vision. Red as a tomato. Breath heavy. Looking away from me.

I look away and take his hand. And his smile appears.

So I basically throw the door open to Murph's cabin. "Tommy! People're sleeping!" he half-shouts, pressing the door shut as quietly as possible. "What're you doing?"

I back him into the door, blocking the light of the cabin from getting to him. "I'm going to kiss you."

"What?"

"I'm going to kiss you."

This look of fear on Murph's face melts into a shaken smile, this big toothy thing that shows off his dimples and his fucking cute face. "Oh, thank God," he whispers, eyes glossy. "I thought I stepped over the line with you in the elevator." His hands're shaking as they wipe his eyes. "S-sorry."

I roll my eyes. I don't mean to. "Why're you sorry?"

Murph breathlessly chuckles. His hands tremble as they snake up the back of his head. "I...I-I knew it wasn't my fault, what happened, but I just – !"

He literally feels bad for something I did.

This has to fucking stop.

I lean down and kiss him. And it's not even how I remember it. His lips are soft and taste like the lingering garlic butter sauce his pasta had. He smells like the ship's lavender soap. Murph's hands find their way to my collar and pull me closer, letting go to wrap his arms around my neck. Murph kisses me deeper, and I step forward, putting my leg between both of his.

He's hard.

That's good. So am I.

He moans into my mouth, and I'm delirious. I fist his hair and pull his body against mine. I put my hands on his face. It's so addicting. My head begins to spin. He kisses so good.

Murph breath is shaking when he pulls back to breathe. Something twists in my stomach and I kiss him again. He leans his forehead against mine and my nose makes his glasses crooked. I pull him closer to me, his arms still around my neck. A big sigh comes first, and then Murph asks, "So..." He swallows, blue eyes looking me up and down. "...so I'm guessing you still like me?"

I laugh. "Nah. I just think you're a hot fuck."

He pulls back but hits the door. "What – "

"No. Yes, I still like you." He's like a disease. Once you've had it, you never really get rid of it.

Murph's chest is heaving. "Good." He looks at me, smiling. Dimples. "Because I still like you, too."

I smile big. "Oh, good." And I lean down to kiss him again, but then I stop myself. "If I'm going too far..." My words trail off. I'm not sure how to phrase it. "Like...just, smack me in the face if you want to stop."

Murph nods. "I'm not that strong, though."

"A knee to the gut works, too."

He laughs. "I wouldn't do that."

I lean forward. "No. Do it. Scream at me if you want me to stop."

"Like what I should've done last time?"

"Probably."

He tightens his grasp on my neck and pulls me closer, if that's possible. "For now, can we just...enjoy this?"

I nod and kiss him again.

And again.

And again.

And again.

And it's fucking perfect.