#MT17
I'm still in the point of weaving and intertwining my feelings for Horace, I don't know if I should trust him already and give him a chance because of his history. Trust is not really my thing now after everything, I couldn't even trust myself around him! Kaya natatakot akong baka sa una lang siya ganito o baka dahil may obligasyon lang siya? I'm not really sure about it.
"So as I was telling, Dad cheated on Mom when I was still in the womb. He planned to get an annulment after knowing that his mistress was pregnant, he planned to remarry for the kid." He shrugged and smirked while disarraying the tips of my hair. "'Cause he was an asshole coveting for it but Mom abruptly told him about me that made him stay for too long 'till now."
My forehead crinkled, I turned to him. He smiled and wiggled his brows, he took a deep breath. He doesn't look comfortable telling me this story so I shook my head to rein it.
"It's okay, ayos na iyong mga narinig ko kung hindi ka kumportable."
His forehead pleated while looking at me, he sighed and smiled slightly. "His mistress took away their son and great time, he hates me too much."
"Ba't siya galit sayo? Hindi naman ikaw 'yong tatay mo." Ngumuso ako at napailing.
It's not right, kailan ba sila nagkakilala bilang magkapatid kung ganoon? Bago lang ba? Gusto ko sanang tanungin pero alam ko namang hindi siya kumportable kaya ayos na ako sa mga nalaman. So this history was telling me that even though he's too jolly, flirt and perfect outside, he also doesn't have a nice view of the past. Mukha siyang nasasaktan pa rin tungkol doon.
He chuckled and pinched my nose. "Kasi bigla silang hindi pinandigan dahil sa akin. I guess that was the told story of his Mom, but my asshole Dad really searched for them so he could give everything. I don't know the exact story, though."
"Maybe the mistress wanted your father to marry her and be with them for the rest."
Nakakainis naman iyon, bakit niya kagagalitan si Horace na wala pa rin namang muwang sa kamalian ng mga magulang nila? Ni hindi nga rin dapat pinatulan ng nanay niya iyong tatay ni Horace dahil kasal ito!
"Yup, you're so brilliant!" he lauded like a kid and pressed his nose on the side of my head to sniff.
Umirap ako, nang-uuto lang 'to e! I just fled out from school after my internship and he brought me to their house again, we're always in the library for my every day homework. Gabi na rin kasi akong nakakauwi pag siya ang kasama kaya mas mabuti na kung gagawin ko iyon habang kasama siya.
I'm really getting too comfortable with him now, kahit malandi siyang lalaki ay may kabutihan pa rin naman at may magandang nagagawa sa buhay. He's lighting my days up everytime we were together, hinahayaan niya akong mag-aral ng ilang oras at saka kami nagkakaroon ng oras na makapag-usap na dalawa tungkol sa buhay.
I told him my life for years after the miscarriage, hindi rin siya kumportable roon pero nakikinig naman at natutuwa ako na hindi pala siya puro kamanyakan pag may kasamang babae o sa akin lang? Maybe, he doesn't really find me too attractive and covetable 'cause I'm not sexy as his girls for the past years. Ayos din pala na ganito ang katawan ko, hindi nakakauhaw. Tsk.
Our days and weeks continue fleeting until the last month before my graduation, kabado ako sa araw-araw dahil ang dami kong naiisip. Kung magmamasters na ba ako o huwag muna, nagdadalawang isip pa rin ako. Horace was convincing me to take masters but he's still considering what I'd want.
Kinagat ko ang labi habang nakatingin sa laptop at nagbabasa ng chats mula sa mga kaibigan at ibang hindi kakilala. I left those strangers in the message request and didn't reply. My Highschool friend chatted.
