Batfamily one-shots

Jason just can't have a normal day

He could have been in a pub right now, drinking until he passed out or even annoying the little demon, anything was better than this situation.

But unfortunately, he wasn't.

Instead, Jason Todd- a deadly vigilante and recovering criminal-killer- was laying flat on his back and staring at curious eyes. Stephanie spoke.

"I...am pleasantly surprised you aren't dead."

"Fuck, I feel like I got hit by a car," Jason gritted his teeth as he sat up. His memory was kind of blurry after beginning to cross the street, but he didn't think someone would actually pull a hit-and-run in the middle of the day. Whatever had taken him out had to have been pretty impressive, though.

                             
"Well," Stephanie looked away and her eyes fell on the new purple monstrosity she had guilted out of Bruce. She had argued that her coming back from the dead definitely meant she got two birthdays and that she had been missing one. She hadn't expected it to work.

That it had was a testament to how distracted their Bat-dad was becoming, and she planned on taking every advantage of his state of mind while she could. With Bruce, distraction soon became an obsession, and after that point, they were all lucky if they saw him outside of patrols.

    
"Wait, I did?" Jason asked, and his eyes followed hers to the purple...vehicle that was undeniably hers. There was no mistaking the rage that was quickly replacing pain in his eyes. "And it was your car?"

Stephanie gave a sheepish giggle.

    
"And what do you mean surprised you aren't dead?"

    
"I said 'pleasantly,'" she corrected. "Plus, it was you who walked out in front of me."

    
"It was a red light!" he argued while testing his body for any breaks. He seemed only bruised which meant he could get a safe distance before he set Stephanie on fire. Or at least her car.

    
"I was following traffic."

    
"There were no other cars."

    
"This usually works with Tim," Steph sighed, and a tic began to work in Jason's jaw that could have been from head trauma, but he was sure was from irritation.

    
"Who taught you how to drive?" he eventually growled out. He figured he should pay them a visit as well. And the DMV worker who thought it was a good idea to give Stephanie Brown a license.

    
She beamed proudly.

"Dick!"

Of course.