The Rule About Coffee

11.3K 400 145
                                    

I am really sorry! I didn't update yesterday and I should have but I do have a real excuse not to. I got and still have a really bad migraine yesterday that is making me feel dizzy and nauseous along with my head feeling as if it's being crushed. I'm really sorry about not updating and I will try not to be late again.

By the way? Does anyone know what makes migraines better and does anyone else get them?


There was a rule. One rule that had to be followed. No matter what. Some people may call this rule stupid. Some people know better. And some people disregard this rule until it's too late and they learn the hard way.

You may be asking yourself, what is this rule? What is the rule that everyone follows once they see what happens when they break it. What is the thing that requires such a rule to be created in the first place? What is the rule, that if broken, sends everyone running for their sanity?

Don't give Peter Parker coffee.

And if you do? Run. You may think that it's over the top but once you see him after having coffee you will understand. If you don't believe me, let me share with you the first time he had coffee.........................


Flashback>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

It was six AM in the morning and everyone was tired. Including Peter Parker.

Peter came shuffling into the kitchen with his eyes half open and half dressed only wearing his pants, socks, and shoes. All of the Avengers cast worried looks over to Peter, sure, he stayed up late at night and was tired most morning but he had never come in only half dressed before.

"You ok Pete?" Tony asks while taking a drink out of his coffee.

"Muhm," Peter mumbles while looking through the fridge.

"What are you looking for?" Natasha asks and Peter turns to her.

"Poptarts," Is his answer and gets everyone to look at him oddly.

"They are kept in the cabinet where they usually are," Bruce says and I look in the cabinet and see that they are there.

"You want some coffee?" Clint asks and Peter shrugs.

"Sure," Peter says and shuffles over to the coffee machine, pours himself a glass, adds about half a cup of sugar and half a cup of cream.

"Would you like some coffee with your sugar and cream?" Tony asks and Peter only grunts in response.

Peter downs his coffee in one drink and you can almost immediately see his reaction. His eyes snap fully open and he seems more alert. If you look closely, you could see his hands start to shake.

"Peter?" Bucky asks noticing the change.

"H-hey, is there something in the coffee?" Peter asks while bouncing his leg.

No one gets to say anything else as he shoots a web onto the ceiling and grins down at the team.

"Na na, bet you can't catch me!" He sings out and scuttles into the living room via the ceiling leaving the whole team blinking in shock.

"What is he doing? He as to leave for school in ten minutes! He's not even fully dressed!" Steve ask/yells.

"I think it may have to do with the coffee," Natasha says and everyone nods.

"Sir, it appears as if Peter has changed the color of all of your suits to pink," FRIDAY interrupts.

"Shit!" Tony curses and then runs out of the room.

"I think he may need help," Bruce says and the rest of the team nods while grumbling.

"Let's go catch a spider," Wanda says and walks off in search of the poor boy who was high on caffeine.

A crash could be heard from two floors down followed by FRIDAY's voice.

"It appears as if Peter has managed to incapacitate Sir and is now webbing Miss Maximoff to the floor," She says and goes back to being silent.

All of the Avengers run down two flights of stairs and see Tony stuck to the wall, Wanda to the floor and Peter dangling down from the ceiling.

"Bet you can't catch me! Bet you can't catch me!" Peter songs while staying on the ceiling.

All of the Avengers get an idea and they smirk to themselves.

"Natasha, get on Clint's shoulder and I'll get on Buckys. We'll pull him down," Steve says and the rest follow his orders.

It looks like an odd version of that pool game with both of the towers of people moving around but instead of knocking the other off, they are trying to catch a certain spider.

The two stacks of people can reach him, they just can't pull him off of the ceiling.

"Why is he so sticky!?" Natasha yells in frustration while pulling at Peters' legs.

"He's like a spider! Keep pulling!" Wanda yells from on the floor, still webbed up.

"Nice try!" Peter sings again and scuttles out of the room again.

"FRIDAY, Call Peter's school and call in sick for him, we are not taking him to school like this. Not that we can even catch him," Tony says and FRIDAY makes the call.

"Guys, we need to track him down before he does something really bad," Sam says and everyone agrees.

"Sir, it appears that Peter has managed to get down to the R&D labs. He is running around and finishing others work. The scientists are freaking as he has been using his webs and climbing the wall," FRIDAY interrupts and everyone winces. 

"To the lab!" Clint yells and runs away.

"I'm going to kill him," Natasha mutters under her breath chasing after him.

The Avengers soon find Peter swinging from one end of the intern's lab to the other while fixing problems and causing mass panic as all of the interns are huddled in one corner.

"Mr. Stark! What is wrong with Peter!?" Maggie, an intern, calls out in fear.

"He accidentally drank one of my experiments and coffee together," Tony says thinking quickly while chasing after Peter who is laughing at this point.

"You can't catch me!" Peter sings while shaking his rear at the Avengers.

"Ok, new plan. Half of us go to one side of the lab and the other half to the other side. We will fan out and corner him into the center of the room and then grab him," Steve says and everyone agrees and splits.

They start walking towards each other and their plan is working. Until Peter drops from the ceiling like a rock. Bucky lunges forward to catch him and is surprised at what he sees. Peter's eyes are closed and he is slightly snoring.

"Is he asleep?" Clint asks and pokes is cheek.

"Caffeine crash," Tony and Rohdey say and the same time and laugh.

"We should get him to bed. And NEVER ever give him coffee again," Natasha says and everyone agrees.

Bucky takes Peter upstairs and tucks him into bed while the other Avengers spend the rest of the day finding every bit of coffee in the tower and destroying it.

So there it is, the one rule everyone must follow.


It's crap but it's all I could pull together with a migraine. Sorry.



Peter Parker One-shotsWhere stories live. Discover now