(A/N) My own little take on "Preacher Man". Enjoy😉
"Rocky, we should stop," I moaned into his mouth. My words completely contradicted the tone of my voice.
"What if I don't want to?" he tested, moaning as well. His hands touched my body wherever they could reach: my thighs, hips, lower back, breasts. We had just finished another round of pure bliss. Although we had both gotten what we wanted, we couldn't find the strength to let go of each other. Something about his sweaty body connected to mine as we caught our breath made me wanna hold on forever. What the fuck am I saying?
"I don't want to either, Rock, but Casey is gonna start asking where I am," I reasoned, trying to pull his mouth away, which found its way to my neck.
"Fuck him," he growled, biting my collarbone.
"I'd rather fuck you," I laughed, causing him to chuckle against my skin. He continued his attack on my body, slowly traveling down my chest. A loud moan escaped my mouth, the noise snapping me back into reality. "Seriously, Rocky," I successfully pushed him off this time. "I need to go. I can't keep doing this to him."
"Just tell him you're spending the night with Rydel," he whined.
"I can't," I sighed, sitting up. "I'd love to stay with you all night, but the guilt is killing me."
"Then leave him," he practically begged. He lovingly cupped my cheek in his large, warm hand. "You know what you feel for me, otherwise you wouldn't be here."
I sighed again, closing my eyes so I didn't have to see the plea on his face. I stood up, collecting my clothes that were thrown across the floor. "I'm sorry, Rocky, but I've gotta go for now. I need to figure things out. I'm playing his heart like a violin and it's killing me."
"I don't give a fuck about him," he growled in jealousy.
"I do!" I snapped, finishing throwing my shirt on. "Sure, you make me feel things he can't. I'll admit that. But it doesn't mean I'm heartless. I don't like hurting people."
"You were mine first," he grumbled, crossing his arms like a toddler.
"There's a reason we didn't work out the first time," I reasoned, now fully dressed.
"Then what are you doing here?" he started raising his voice.
"I don't know!" I yelled back. "I don't know what the fuck you're doing to me. I hate it!"
He stood up, still completely bare. I had to avert my eyes as he walked dangerously close to me. I backed up, only to be cornered by him and the wall. His hands were up against the wall, caging me in.
"If you hated it, you wouldn't have been in my bed ten minutes ago," he said, his warm breath hitting my neck. "You wouldn't be trembling at our close proximity right now."
"Shut up," I growled, pushing his chest. Well... attempting. His feet stayed planted on the ground, not even budging.
"You know I'm right, princess," he whispered in my ear, the nickname tugging at my heart strings.
"Just please let me go, Rocky," I practically begged at this point. He pulled away from me, staring into my eyes like he was reading me. His face softened and he put his arms down. I breathed in relief, slipping past him.
"Don't let this be nothing, (Y/N)," he said, barely above a whisper, as I was at the door of his bedroom. His words made me stop, hand hovering over the knob.
"It's not nothing, Rocky. I promise."
And with that, I left him naked, confused, and alone in his room. I had to clear my head, which obviously couldn't be done with him around.
-1 Hour Later-
"Hey, baby," I heard from the living room as I closed the front door of my boyfriend's apartment. I sighed to myself, wishing I didn't have to face him after just making love to another man merely two hours prior.
"Hey, Casey," I called back, faking a sweet voice. He made his way over to me, pulling me into his arms. The smile on his face only made me feel ten times shittier.
I took in the scent of his cologne, hoping to calm myself down. I only panicked more when I started comparing it to the scent of Rocky's cologne, and at the fact that Rocky's was better.
"How was your day with the girls?" he asked, his voice bringing me back to earth.
"Great," I lied right to his face. "Ate a ton of food and talked, as always."
"Cool, cool," he said, smiling down at me. I attempted to smile back, but I could tell he wasn't buying it. His eyebrows furrowed, his forehead creasing with concern. "You ok?"
"I'm just tired," I sighed. That wasn't completely a lie.
"You sure? You look like something is bothering you," he said as he rubbed his thumbs against the skin of my waist. "You know you can tell me anything right?"
My heart broke at the fact that he was being so sweet.
"I know, Case. Of course I know. But I'm just tired," I said as I kissed his cheek. The next words out of his mouth left me completely stunned.
"So, you don't wanna tell me about the hickeys down your neck? Or the cologne I don't recognize on you?"
Fuck.
How the hell did I have hickeys? Rocky knows the rules.
Busted.
By then I knew he was acting clueless, waiting to see if I was going to fess up to my actions. But I didn't.
"Casey, I-I," I started as he pulled his arms away from my waist.
"No, I get it, (Y/N). I'm not enough for you," he interrupted me, clearly hurt. Tears stung my eyes as his head hung.
"Look, for what it's worth, just listen to me," I insisted. "This seriously has nothing to do with you. I'm sorry I led you on, and I'm sorry I hid this from you. You were nothing but a gentleman and I don't deserve you."
"Just tell me who," he requested quietly, his eyes glossy.
"Rocky," I whispered shamefully. I hung my head in shame to avoid eye contact.
"I expected that," he shrugged.
"I'm sorry, Casey. I'm a piece of shit," I sighed, rubbing my forehead in frustration.
"A little bit," he smiled to himself. I could tell he was trying to joke around and lighten the mood, but it still stung. "Look, I'm not gonna lie, this hurts. But if you still love him, go ahead. I'm not gonna stop you."
"Thank you," I breathed in relief, pulling him into a hug. "I'm so sorry, again. You're gonna make someone really happy one day."
"I hope things go well with you and him this time," he smiled, although there was a glint of sadness in his eyes.
"Thank you, really. You're a great guy. I'm sorry it couldn't work out," I apologized for the thousandth time.
"I get it, (Y/N). Shit happens sometimes. I know you didn't mean to hurt anyone, and that you're not a bad person," he soothed me, although he had no obligation to. I cheated, not him.
"I'm gonna go," I spoke up after a moment of silence. I gave him one final hug, heading for the door.
"I want my hoodies back!" he called out just before I closed it. His remark made me laugh.
"They're mine, bitch!" I yelled back. I could hear his chuckle boom through his apartment. With a smile still on my face, I headed to the place that I knew I belonged.
And maybe Casey and I could be friends. Maybe he hates my guts. Maybe Rocky and I will end up breaking up again and it would all be for nothing. Who knows? Life is fucked up like that. But I'd rather be fucked up with the man I love.
