Short Stories Collection

Singhoul Hearts Club

This was my contribution to TheCRYPTIC_ 's The Laughing Crow anthology. It was my attempt at a dark humor short story :) 

[I]

Love was in the air, and that made Nogabo wickedly happy.

The city street heaved with mankind. That great big ball of light shone down on them all, bathing them in a false sense of comfort and happiness. Nogabo strolled among the unsuspecting folk, his dark robes brushing along the pavement. Unseen and unheard, little more than a spirit, Noga rejoiced in his anonymity, and the mischief he would inflict upon them.

Couples and potential love surrounded him. Perfect pickings.

Passing by a cowboy-themed restaurant, Noga stopped to gaze upon a young couple sitting by the window. His pale and bony features reflected back at him. He couldn't help but let out a sigh. He detested the fact that his look had long ago become associated with the Grim Reaper. The depictions of the pale figure in black was his look! Grim got all the credit, while the world had no idea of Noga's own existence. What irked Noga the most was that Grim actually wore colourful shirts – the ones that eventually became known as Hawaiian shirts – and large frilly shorts that looked more like a great big tutu. But then everyone who saw Grim didn't live to tell anyone.

Noga was so much more, however. A Singhoul, the only one of his kind, he was tasked a very long time ago with one special purpose: keep love away from humanity. A task that ran counter to that little creature Cupid, his nemesis. Oh how Noga despised that baby-faced horror.

He sniffed the air and smiled. First date. Nerves and hormones reeked from the couple before him, mingling with their watery soup appetisers. The man was telling the woman a story that meant to impress, his phoney confident voice reaching Noga through the glass. Noga saw all and heard all, and he loved every minute with these sad playthings.

At seeing the captivated look in the woman's eyes, a flush of irritation rushed through Noga. A slight motion of his shoulder was all it took to influence them. The man suddenly ignited a massive sneeze, blowing out the hot soup all over the table and splashing on the woman. Her shocked and infuriated face – his face dripping with hot soup - was a soothing balm that made Noga smile.

As the woman stormed from the table, following by an appalled and grovelling man, Noga turned away from them, giggling to himself. Today would be a fun session. He couldn't help but shake his head as he walked on, thinking of that pathetic thing called love. He despised anyone who was idiotic enough to fall in love. One man's pleasure was another man's pain. Love was the pain bestowed upon mankind, and it was Noga's pleasure to cure them of it.

It was his eternal task, and his greatest joy.

[II]

The next targets were approaching him; a tall bearded hipster and a young brunette in a summer dress, holding hands. As they passed, a low whistle was all that was needed. An obnoxious fart erupted from the woman, billowing her dress. The man yanked his hand away from her and gasped with repulsion, staring unbelievingly at the woman's horrified expression. Noga hopped with delight, a girlish laugh escaping him as he clenched his fists with glee.

Back to it, his senses already alerted him to his next target. Up ahead, a meek little man walked towards him, heading to a street corner. A woman in a red skirt approached the other side of the corner, heading directly into the path of the man.

In an instant Noga had all the information he needed.

A flap of a hand caused the man to sidestep slightly, his foot heading towards a mound of dog poop. But his worn trainers landed just beside the poop. Noga huffed and strode closer, focusing. Their potential love was strong. He threw out another blast of influence and this time the woman's skirt flapped up. While she struggled to keep her modesty, the man turned the corner and ambled by, completely oblivious of her. Noga sighed with relief, his shoulders dropping. That was a close one.