What Was Ours

3. Beginning of the end

I sigh, there's nothing to think about here. It's time to head home and spend some time with my children. I turn off my laptop and put it away in my briefcase. I make sure to leave everything in order and take what I need to finish home. This has already become routine for me.

I haven't stayed countless hours "stuck" in the office. That habit died a long time ago. One habit that died the day Jinnie stepped out of my life with our unborn child. That child must be around six years old today. I've missed so many years of that child's life. All because I couldn't bear the thought of losing all that I've built today. Funny how I'm regretting that decision, when, at the time, I was regretting ever getting involved with him.

My life shouldn't be a gamble. Whatever I decide, I have to live with for the rest of my life. I'm already regretting so much and I don't want to continue like this. There won't be easy decision to make and it may take some time before doing anything. I have so much to think about. Positives versus negatives. I've got a long list to make. I hope, I make the right decisions this time.

"Daddy!" My oldest daughter comes running to hug me.

"Hani," I huff. Every single time she knocks the wind out of me. She's no longer a small child but I couldn't deny I loved coming home to a big hug. "Holding the house down for me?"

"Yeah, Jeonghwa isn't feeling too good and eomma took her to the hospital. She got too sick." She says. I let her go and take my phone out to see if I received any phone calls but there's none. She continues her story and I manage to hear her talk about a room and her brother's name.

"Hani, I've got to call eomma. Can you go with your brother and wait for me?" She nods and runs off to the dining room.

I immediately call my wife. I'm upset to come home and find out that my child is in the hospital. Not only that but her eomma is with her and I never receive anything telling me about the incident. She hadn't called me or texted me once. I don't even know if they just left or have been there for some time. I calm down before talking to her. It only takes a few minutes to find out the location, time of admission, and the cause. That's all I need for me to head over there.

I tell my children, I'll be going to the hospital with their sister. Also, I would try to be back before bed time but I wasn't sure. I kiss them goodbye before letting their nanny know I would go with my wife to the hospital. I just need to be sure my baby is okay and see it with my own eyes.

"Is she okay?" I ask as soon as I get there. They're both in a private room.

"Yes, the doctor said she'll stay the night to start the antibiotics. We can take her home tomorrow if nothing else presents itself." That's all she says before putting her attention on the menu. She's probably picking out the healthiest choice.

My daughter lays quietly in slumber. She looks like she'll be okay, there's only a light pink on her cheeks which was probably due to the fever. Other than that she looks like my baby girl.

"Have you been here long?" I ask the dumb question. "You can go home if you'd like. I'll stay with her. You need to go home, have dinner. The hospital cafeteria is probably closed by now."

"Alright, but I won't be back before they close the front doors. Will you stay with her?" I nod my head. "Alright. Tell her I love her and I'll try to be here first thing tomorrow morning. Have a good night." She kisses my cheek before gathering her belongings and leaving.

This makes things less awkward for me. We really have nothing to talk about, except our kids. Those kids may be the only ones holding me in this marriage.

I sit down on the bedside chair. I'm glad it's a reclining chair because the hospital sofa looks more uncomfortable than this chair. I need to rest if only for a minute.