Crashed Into a Gangster

40

Victoria

Darkness begins to coil inside me, as I stab the tip of the shovel into the dirt. Thunder booms above me before I can put the lifeless body under the ground. I feel like something's stopping me from doing so. Maybe the part of me that used to love him...
I run a hand through my hair - catching the breath I never paused to take.

After I saw my engagement ring...and the address that a piece of me figured would lead me to my ex fiancé's body; I allowed the address to instruct me here. I came here knowing what was waiting...I came to see Jack's bruised, pale body sealed in clear plastic...didn't I? Images of his purple and blue skin kept flashing into my mind like rapid, vicious waves. I didn't know what to think when I saw him here...

The rain starts to pour mercilessly, as I stand over the disheveled pile of dirt. I still haven't buried him. Am I OK with...this?

Jack is dead. And my presumptions, just from looking at my ex fiancé's unmoving body; tell me Rio. Rio did this...he probably felt the need to. No, he didn't need to put Jack in any harm...but he did.

For me...?

I tangle either of my hands in my soaked hair, before dropping to my knees. I feel like the gangster's ruining me...
I hurriedly blink to avoid the pouring rain - before a tear itself slips down my cheek. I don't know what to feel. Suddenly, anger mixes with my emotion. My breathing exceeds under the hard-crying clouds, and I allow myself to fall back onto the sticky ground. Facing up, to the flashing, threatening sky looking down at me sending darts of liquid - darkness still coils. I try to tame my breathing, and swallow. I roll over to my side - wishing only for a silent mind to get back up and dig.
But man, is this hard.

Finally, forcibly, I push myself from off the mudded ground, and stand on my own two feet. Though my heart hammers, I flick my gaze down to see the mud on my shaky hands, before gripping the shovel, and pulling it from the muddy ground the gravity has sucked it into. I squeeze the shovel, tight, taking in a breath. And I dig up the last few feet needed - or however deep I would imagine Jack would stay under.

The lightning won't stop flashing - as for the thunder above won't stop roaring; startling me each booming echo it decides to make.
When I finally finish, and reach deep enough into the muddy ground, I hesitate to glance next to me, but I do. I stare at Jack's still, breathless body on the mud before me. I curl my lip, in thought - forcing myself to think of all the bad things he's done so I wouldn't feel such... guilt.

All I can think of is that he cheated...
I sigh heavily, and throw the shovel aside. I bend down to tug on the body. And after certain struggle, his body finally lands into the hole of blackness. I gather my breath, and straighten. All I know is that I'm uncertain, of what to feel about all of this, and to ponder on if Rio really did this, and why?

I try to brush off all the mud that's smeared on my clothes, but I only make it worse from the possessive mud on each of my palms. I give up, and stare down at Jack's body in the hole I have my legs spread apart over. I stand, while another taunting thought occurs to me.
How long was he...

I shake my head, ridding these taunting thoughts. I step aside. I grab the shovel once again, never releasing the gaze I have on Jack below. I have no final words to him... do I?

As my breathing increases at a dangerous rate, my wet lips part, and a firm breath escapes my lips. "He's way more of a man than you have ever been..." I spit, just before covering his still body with soaked dirt.

--

I slam on my brakes, claiming the empty parking space, before I get out my car and slam my door shut. I make my way toward the Pawn Shop, and swing the glass double doors open. I walk up to the front counter; muddy, as my cheeks are probably stained with mascara, my hair disheveled. The salesman behind the counter gives me a frantic once over with wide eyes. Tom, his name tag says.

I arch a brow, before deciding to ignore his judgmental examination and pull off the muddy ring from my finger. I carefully sit my engagement ring on the glass surface separating us. I huff out a shaky breath, ready for an exchange. "How much for the ring?" I begin in an exhausted breath. Tom watches me another moment, before gently - as if he's got some germaphobe thing going on - picking up the golden ring. He puts the muddy ring up to his face in examination. I watch his light eyes meet mine through the hole of the diamond ring.

"Erm...I'd say it's...a fair trade of $2,000." Tom shrugs in his collared shirt. "Maybe $2,300 given the obvious carats...without the mud." He adds, his voice low and seemingly anxious. I bite down on my lip, politely taking the engagement ring from his hold, and begin to clean off as much mud as I can with my mudded hands. I only take seconds scrubbing, before I toss it back to him.

I fixate my brown eyes up to the employee - to see his careful eyes averted onto the cleanish ring on the glass surface. Tom parts his lips as if he were to speak, but when his young orbs meet mine, his lips shut immediately.

Moments later, I walk out of the Pawn Shop, and get into my car with the $2,300 check. Shortly after, I start the ignition to be on my way, and see my... business partner.

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