I made my way back over to Ryan who was nursing two plates of funnel cake. He pushed a plate over to me as I sat down next to him. "How'd it go?"
"Good actually." It wasn't perfect but it definitely wasn't awful.
"Good," He gave me a thumbs up while trying to push down a mouth full of cake.
I laughed a little bit and pulled out my phone to make sure everything with Patrick was okay. I didn't have any notifications so I took that as a good sign.
"If you want to see the fireworks start heading towards the lawn now!" A voice boomed out from every direction.
Ryan looked at me, "We should go do that."
Nodding, I stood up and threw my trash away. Everyone else decided they wanted to go the same way so Ryan and I stood back. "Here, " I grabbed his hand and dragged him to a hill that was a little spread out from everyone else but still close enough so we wouldn't get screamed at. I stay down and pulled him into my lap.
"Thanks for dragging me along."
"No need to thank me, it was Patrick's idea, but I would have probably dragged you along if he didn't suggest it."
He laughed at me, "Okay." He put his head back and close his eyes. "I hate that we have to hide. You deserve someone like Sarah. Not saying I'm jealous, but you just deserve the best and I'm far from it."
"Hey, don't talk like that. If I didn't want to be in a relationship with you I wouldn't be. You're the best thing I could ever have so you're wrong there."
He kept his eyes closed but he had a small smile on his face now. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and stared onwards. I felt like this was all that mattered. Him, us, this hill, we didn't have to worry about his dad, or my parents, curfews kids at school, none of that. Just each other.
A bang went off and I felt Ryan jump against me. I laughed and held him tighter.
"Don't laugh!" He couldn't help it either though.
Another bang went off but this time his eyes were open. "I haven't seen fireworks since I was like five."
"Really?"
He nodded. "That's when my mom and dad split up, he got custody and she moved away to California. That whole period I wasn't here, I was with her."
"Why did you come back?"
"My mom couldn't handle me. I don't blame her I was a lot to handle." He smiled sadly. "I won't get into anything else, tonights suppose to be fun, I don't want to bring down the mood."
"That's okay, I'm always here to talk, even if it's right now."
He nodded, "Thank you."
"You don't need to thank me."
The colors danced in the sky with popping sounds that became more tolerable throughout the night. Smoke danced away from after each went off.
A breeze flew through the air blowing the fairground smell up to the hill. I felt something drop on my arm, looking down, I saw tears falling down his face. "Hey, " I pulled him up so he was facing me. "What's wrong?"
He shook his head and buried his face in my shirt. "It's stupid."
"If it made you cry, it's not."
"I cry over stupid things."
I lifted his face up again, placing my hand to his face, and wiped his tears away. "Tell me and I'll tell you if it's stupid."
"I was just thinking about how much I would have messed up if my attempt really did work."
I felt my heart sank and I hugged him like he would disappear if I let go. "That's defiantly not stupid. But I'm so glad it didn't work."
"Me too." He sounded sincere which you didn't hear often when it came from him. "I have something else I need to tell you."
"Hm?"
He still had his arms wrapped around me so I couldn't see his face. "I love you."
As stupid as it may sound, I don't think I ever felt so meaning of those three words. I mean it's so easy to throw them mindlessly because that's what you're supposed to do when it's a relationship. But this felt different, it felt like it meant something. "I love you too."
