My Mother Runs With Wolves

Chapter 2

"Maddie, I hope you're not doing construction in there," Mom shouts from the room next door.

"I'm putting stuff away!"

A masculine voice from my doorway startles me. "What are you putting away, bowling balls?"

I whip around and find him standing there, smiling lazily. "Dad, you shouldn't sneak up on a girl. It's not polite."

He shrugs. "I can't help it."

"You're back," Mom murmurs as she sidles up to him and curls an arm around his neck for a kiss.

It isn't a simple peck on the cheek and I look away.

"He's right you know," she says after pulling away. "He can't help it. When he walks, he stalks. I can't even smell him."

"Maybe that's a good thing," I reply, coming closer and plucking at his damp shirt. "Look how sweaty he is."

"That's quite possibly the best thing about living with wolves," he says, planting a kiss on top of Mom's head. "Wolfstalker stench is invisible to you."

"I'm not a wolf." My voice is flat as I turn away and head back to my box.

"You're close enough." He gestures toward the window. "Tell me you don't know what today's special is at that diner down the road two miles away. I know we're downwind."

The faint smells of liver and onions have been tickling my nose all afternoon. People actually order that stuff? "Did we move into a retirement community?"

"Agricultural communities have a lot of... traditions." Mom says. She sniffs the air. "Could use a bit of cumin, though, don't you think?"

My sense of smell is keen, but not that keen. I shrug like I don't care, even though it bothers me to be reminded that I'm not the complete wolf she is. "Close enough," I murmur to myself, turning away from them.

"Something wrong, sweetie?" Mom asks.

I look down at the brown carpet. I'm not a whiner. I don't want them to think I'm not grateful for all the love and support they give me. I couldn't ask for better parents. But... these feelings of isolation keep gnawing at me like invisible rats. I kick them away, but more seem to swarm in from different directions.

I don't realize I'm talking until the words are out of my mouth. "Almost doesn't really count."

"What do you mean?" Dad is a trained hunter, but not exactly the best at picking up his own daughter's feelings.

I face them again and lift my eyes. "It's just..." No, don't tell them. They worry enough about you as it is. But I can't seem to stop myself. "I almost have a car. Doesn't mean I have a car. I almost had friends at my last school. Doesn't mean I actually had any. I'm almost a wolf." I drop my gaze to the empty boxes in the corner. "It means I'm not."

Dad is silent as he studies me in that analytical manner of his. "Is this about the car again? Because I thought we said—"

Something inside me snaps. "Honestly, Dad! It's not about the stupid car. You don't get it! I don't know how you can call yourself a Stalker when you can't even see what's in front of you. No wonder you left the Order!" I push past him to escape the room.

I stomp out to the front porch and lean against a post to gulp in some fresh air. I hadn't meant to yell at him like that. I sounded like a stupid, petulant child. What was wrong with me?

"Ruby, what are we doing wrong?" I can hear Dad asking Mom, even though they're speaking quietly inside the house. My hearing may not be as acute as Mom's, but they're still wolfish enough to eavesdrop from outside.

"She's working through some issues, Nate," Mom answers. "We just have to... let her."

Poor Dad. He thinks it's his fault.

Well, I guess it kind of is? A Wolfstalker marrying a Shifter is unheard of. Some would say ridiculous. Yet that's what my parents did.

And then they made me.

Mom is right. I have been facing some issues. The term has different meanings for me than for most girls my age. A typical girl might have issues like these:

     - Does that guy like me or not?

     - Should I study or hang out with my friends?

     - I don't have enough money for that awesome skirt.

     - Do I have spinach in my teeth?

My issues are a bit more abnormal. They tend to sound like this:

     - How do I make friends when there are no other half Stalker, half Shifter girls around?

     - If I make friends, then I'd have to worry about keeping my family's secret. Is it worth it?

     - Why do I feel like I need to be alone, and yet I hate being alone, both at the same time?

     - Can people tell what I am?

     - Do I know what I am?

     - Where is that smell coming from??

When I list it out like that, it doesn't seem so bad. But I think about these things constantly. My parents' love used to be enough for me. I don't understand why it isn't anymore. I never used to feel so out of place in my own skin.

And to make matters worse, school starts in two days.

Do you look forward to school? Or dread it? I look forward to votes!