The girl in the attic

(18)The girl in the attic

"I'm sorry you had to chase them away for me, I shouldn't have come back," she said turning the page and looking down at the photos again.  

"You don't have to apologize, it was my choice to chase them away and help you. I wouldn't have done it if I didn't want too," I said being completely honest one again. I might have had some fun with my friends before but Katie was just more important which was strange considering that I only met her a few days ago and knew almost nothing about her.  

"But what about your girlfriend, I saw you too kissing just before you chased after me that night," she asked looking guilty and I could swear I saw a hint of jealousy in her eyes. My tummy exploded in butterflies and for the briefest of moments I wished that it was Katie I was kissing that night instead of Becky.

"She isn't my girlfriend, Sarah was but I broke up with her," I answered pointing to Sarah on one of the pictures.  

"But... I don't understand," she whispered more to herself then to me as she continued examining the pictures. I could tell that she had dropped the conversation, she probably didn't want to ask me too many questions considering she didn't really want to talk to me about her personal life but I felt like I had to explain it to her.  

"I dated Sarah for a while, she was fun but I never loved her. The girl you saw me kissing is Becky, I had this huge crush on her since I can remember but once I kissed her I realized that I didn't really want her. I know it was wrong but I guess I was stupid, I was so obsessed about how she looked that I never really noticed her personality. I chose to go find you that night because I care about you and I chased them away because I didn't want to date or be friends with them anymore," I explained hoping she would understand and not freak out because I told her that I cared about her. It is the truth and I figured she had the right to know, maybe she would open up to me more if she knew I wasn't just pretending.

She didn't say anything about what I had just told her, instead she closed the album and handed it back to me.  

"Thanks for letting me look," she said smiling at me. I put the album away and joined her on the bed again. It was killing me inside to know how she felt about what I just told her but I didn't dare to ask. We both just sat there so I switched on the TV to avoid an awkward silence. We watched some movie that was on and then I headed downstairs to see if dinner was ready. My aunt and uncle weren't back home yet but Lina was busy making us pasta. She told me that it would be ready in about ten minutes so I headed back upstairs to check on Katie. When the ten minutes had passed I went back downstairs to fetch my food. I told Lina that I would dish up for myself and that I was going to eat upstairs in my room. She shook her head in agreement as she started washing the dishes.

I grabbed a big plate out of the cupboard and heaped up as much spaghetti on it as possible hoping that Lina didn't notice. I quickly grabbed two forks and made my way upstairs. Katie's eyes lit up when she saw the food but after a few bites she couldn't eat anymore. She forced me to eat the rest telling me that she didn't want the food to go to waste and that she was fine. I didn't believe the part about her being fine but I ate the food wanting to make her happy.

After I was done eating I changed the bandage on her leg again and gave her some more pain tablets. She hasn't complained about feeling sick since she threw up in the bathroom but I didn't want to take any chances.

I had completely forgotten to buy her some pajamas so I gave her another pair of boxers to sleep in. She looked tired so at around eight I suggested that we should get some sleep so that we weren't tired when we went to go see her brother in the morning. She agreed happily and climbed under the sheets.

I went to go lay down on the mattress on the floor again with a million different thoughts running through my head. I couldn't fall asleep but I didn't want to listen to my I pod in case Katie woke up and tried to talk to me or something. I could tell that she was sleeping but it didn't take long before she started moaning again. I sat up and watched her carefully. Her moans turned into soft sobs stabbing at my heart. I wasn't sure if she was awake or sleeping so I got up and walked over to the bed trying not to make any noise.

I sat down on the bed next to her still being careful in case she wasn't awake. I placed my hand on her forehead wanting to feel if her fever was playing up again when her teary eyes opened and focused on me. I wasn't sure what she thought I was doing but she didn't look scared as she watched me.

"Are you ok?" I asked feeling like an idiot as soon as the words left my mouth, it was obvious that she was far from ok. She shook her head as more tears filled her eyes and ran down her face.  

"What can I do to help?" I asked feeling helpless, how could I help her if I had no idea what was wrong.  

"There's nothing you can do," she whispered through the sobs.  

"There has to be something. I'll do anything you want, just tell me how I can help," I said desperately, I hated seeing her like this. She closed her eyes for a few seconds and then focused them back on me. She looked scared and sad, I wanted to comfort her so badly it was causing my heart to break.  

"Will you hold me?" She asked looking hesitant as more tears ran down her cheek. Her words managed to shock me once again but at least this time it didn't take me a few seconds to regain my composure. She needed me and I had to be strong for her, I didn't have time to wonder about her actions.  

"Yes, of course," I answered wondering what she had in mind but I didn't have to wonder for long as she pulled open the covers so that I could get in next to her.

My heart sped up and it literally felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. I moved to the other side of the bed and got in under the covers with her. She turned so that she was lying on her side facing me.  

"Thank you," She whispered softly as she moved closer to me. I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tightly against me trying to make her feel better  

"It's my pleasure," I whispered back as she laid in my arms crying.